‘The Loch Ness Horror’ Review
Stars: May Kelly, Becca Hirani, Tara MacGowran, Lila Lasso, Matthew Baunsgard, Giedre Jackyte, Beatrice Fletcher, Howard j Davey, Mike Kelson, Rob Kirtley, Dan Gittens | Written and Directed by Tyler-James
A submarine vanishing prompts a rescue operation that comes face to face with the cause -The Loch Ness Monster. Having escaped the Loch, it is now unleashing decades of pent-up aggression on all those it encounters. In a fight for survival, our team of rescue operatives must overcome the terrors both beneath them and within their ranks.
Here we are again, with yet another film in the seemingly never-ending inter-connected world of British low-budget horror filmmaking. This one comes from Dark Asylum Films, a production/distribution/sales shingle originally started by Rhys Frake-Wakefield who’s worked with the likes of Scott Jeffrey on Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey, which also starred the superb May Kelly, who appears in this film too (and steals the film as usual) as one of the team searching for the remains of the missing submarine.
Also starring in The Loch Ness Horror is Becca Hirani, aka Rebecca Matthews, Scott Jeffrey’s writing/directing/producing partner who started out in front of the camera acting under the name Becky Fletcher in the likes of Darker Shades of Elise, Fox Trap and Scott Jeffrey’s first remake of Unhinged. Hirani has gone on to produce 50 films since then, only acting now and again – though having Medusa’s Venom, Punch and this film all released back to back makes it feel like she’s been acting in more of these films than she actually has!
The Loch Ness Horror comes from writer/director Tyler-James, who penned The Mermaid’s Curse for director Louisa Warren (another in this large group of inter-connected UK genre filmmakers, most notably working under her own ChampDog Films production company) but has most recently directed the on-the-nose titled monster movies, Sky Monster, Dinosaur Prison and Monsternado! The double-barrelled Tyler-James obviously knows how to handle a low budget and puts that experience to good use here – utilising the permanently docked HMS Cavalier brilliantly, providing an excellent PHYSICAL backdrop to the CGI-based monster action.
Dark Asylum Films had two decent horror films released earlier in 2023 – Three Blind Mice and Mary Had a Little Lamb, both of which I really enjoyed – but unfortunately for the audience watching this one, The Loch Ness Horror is nowhere near on a par with the aforementioned productions. This one feels like too much of a mish-mash of ideas, possibly triggered by both budgetary restraints and the availability of the boat on which the film is set – we get a rescue mission, a giant sea creature (the escaped Nessie) and then… yes, as if those two plot points aren’t enough, we get a riff on Alien as one of the rescue team gets back on to the ship and gives birth to a strange alien/sea creature that runs rampant on the ship too!
Yet for all that, the myriad of plot points means that whilst the film isn’t great, it’s never dull. Never. Writer/director Tyler-James keep the story moving at pace, right from the opening prologue; and the film is helped immensely by the locale and the atmosphere the cast and crew manage to generate on a meagre budget. Hell, even the CGI – for a low-budget British horror AND compared to some of the CGI in other productions like this – isn’t all that bad. It’s not The Meg, which it feels – given the poster and logo for this release – distributor Uncork’d Entertainment wanted to mimic but it’s not your typical The Asylum/Syfy channel monster movie CGI either.
*** 3/5
The Loch Ness Horror is out now on DVD and digital platforms in the US from Uncork’d Entertainment; and is currently scheduled for a UK DVD release on February 12th 2024.
