08th Feb2021

Friday Night Smackdown – Feb 5th 2021: Results & Review

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Friday Night Smackdown review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have the fall-out from the Royal Rumble show and Edge winning the Rumble itself. Edge is here to build toward who he will pick for WrestleMania, whi…what the… Judge Dredd: I AM…THE LAW! Me: Ummmmm… Judge Dredd: Put down…your weapon! You are under…arrest! Me: Ummmm… Judge Dredd: This is your final…warning! Me: Ca…can I help y… Judge Dredd: You stand accused of creatively expressing an opinion for public consumption. This crime is known as “mental littering”. People don’t need to hear the thoughts of others as they are made. How would you feel if you wrote a book and I told people what I thought of it? Me: Ummmm…thank you? Judge Dredd: I knew you’d say that. Thugs like you are always grasping at straws just to get a drink. For your crime of mental littering, I sentence you twenty years on the Jupiter moon of Titan. Maybe there you’ll have all the time in the world to share your opinions…scum-bag. Me: Ummmm… Judge Dredd: I knew you’d say that. Me: This is insane! Judge Dredd: You just can’t stop, can you, sleeze-ball? Hershey…haul his ass away. Me: Hey! Hey! Help! Help! SmackDown starts… (Dredd kicks Nathan in balls) Ow! My balls! Judge Dredd: Court’s adjourned.

Match #1: Dominik Mysterio def. King Corbin

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Despite his determined nature, Dominik Mysterio fell short against King Corbin in their second match in a row last week. In the aftermath, thought, concerned father Rey Mysterio repelled an assault from the sadistic monarch and left him laying at ringside. Then, in Sunday’s Royal Rumble Match, it was Dominik who eliminated Corbin from the contest. As a result, an irate Corbin viciously attacked both Rey Mysterio and his son from before his rematch with Dominik. In the process, he injured Rey’s knee. Nevertheless, in the final moments of the matchup, Rey snuck after the squared circle as the action moved outside the ring. When Corbin attempted to climb back through the rope, Rey emerged from under the apron and trapped his leg. This paved the way for Dominik to hit the 619 into a Splash for a big victory.

My Opinion: 2 out of 10

Match #2: Cesaro def. Daniel Bryan

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

After Cesaro backed up his outspoken words with a couple of impressive victories over the former World Champion Daniel Bryan, a very focused Leader of the “Yes!” Movement came to the ring with an opportunity to get back in the win column against The Swiss Superman. Nevertheless, the impressive Cesaro would ultimately prevail in a tough back-and-forth matchup by making Bryan tap-out to the sharpshooter. As the smoke cleared, Cesaro offered the fist bump to his opponent in a gesture of respect over the hard-fought contest.

My Opinion: 7 out of 10

Match #3: Bayley def. Ruby Riott

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

After losing to Bianca Belair last week and then being eliminated by the EST of WWE in the Royal Rumble Match, Bayley aimed to get a much needed victory against The Riott Squad’s Ruby Riott. When Bayley locked up her opponent in the submission, Billie Kay became excited and came off her seat at SmackDown commentary to try and get into the ring. The distraction only further muddied the waters, however, and The Role Model secured the victory anyway.

My Opinion: 4 out of 10

Match #4: Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode def. Otis & Chad Gable

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

The newly-crowned SmackDown Tag Team Champions Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode competed for the first time since winning the titles from The Street Profits a few weeks ago on SmackDown. With the hilarious Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins hijacking SmackDown commentary team for the duration of the match, The Showoff hurled Otis into the ring post, ultimately paving the way for Roode to hit Gable with the Glorious DTT and give the self-proclaimed “Dirty Dawgs” the victory.

My Opinion: 4 out of 10

Match #5: (Main Event) Big E def. Apollo Crews and Sami Zayn – Intercontinental Title Triple Threat Match

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Big E took on his biggest challenge as Intercontinental Champion to date, defending his title in a Triple Threat Match against a fixated Apollo Crews and a paranoiac Sami Zayn. After an incredible battle all three competitors, Apollo Crew launched Sami Zayn over the ringside barricade. But when he returned to the ring to try and finish Big E off, he walked right into The Powerhouse of Positivity’s Big Ending and the pin fall.

My Opinion: 6 out of 10

Final Verdict: 5/10

This show wasted a lot of time, but it also didn’t stink-up the joint either. I…what the…AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Dan Marino: I’m gonna win the Super Bowl! I’m gonna win the Super Bowl! I’m gonna win the Super Bo…ow! I tripped over this bald, fat, man! I am pissed! Now I won’t win the Super Bowl! Me: Dan Marino? National Football League player and perennial loser of the Super Bowl Dan Marino? What the f— am I doing back forty years ago? Is this like Quantum Leap or something? Dan Marino: I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you! I’ll kill y… ow! I tripped over this potato slut again! Me: S—! While I run away from Dan Marino… Dan Marino: I’ll kill you! I wanna win the Super Bowl! Me: This show actually had six matches, but far too much of the action was crammed into matches that went short and offered very little in good wrestling. Dominik and Corbin limped to the barn to be put down and managed to s— the hay-bed enough to knockout the farmer before they could blast a hole in the horse…enough farm jokes. We got another surprise in Cesaro and Bryan’s latest barn-burner…no more farm jokes! Cesaro beat Bryan by submission this time, which was the finish to an excellent match that simply was too short to reach its potential. I’m glad to see Bryan take a chance on putting over Cesaro and Shinsuke so much. I hope we still get Bryan going after Roman for the Universal Title for ‘Mania, by the way. Bryan can take the loss like few others, so this is no major issue if it’s his choice to lose so much lately. All in all, the Bryan/Cesaro bout was the highlight of the show. It all sucks from here on in…mostly. Bayley and Ruby tried to make the most of just a few minutes, Dolph and Robert dealt with having an annoying inset promo from The Street Profits screw with their match and we had a Triple Threat bout for the Intercontinental Title that was all gusto with no thought. Every-thing past Cesaro/Bryan was decent and even exciting on occasion, but it was also just a descent into a vibrant lull, if such a thing even exists. Hulk Hogan cut a promo on how Edge will be a great contender at WrestleMania and Edge screwed with Roman Reigns to allow Kevin Owens to attack Roman Reigns. This was a show that kept the status quo alive, but still suggested how that status quo may be getting changed in the near future. Over-all, this was a solid show, but it needed to get a bit more ambitious to match the atmosphere that now exists, courtesy of WrestleMania coming on the horizon and the special occasion of Edge making his grand return to championship glory. I…oh s—! Dan Marino: I’ll kill you! I wanna win the Super Bowl! Me: Who cares, d—-head?! You’re rich! Dan Marino: Oh. Okay. Me: Well, that’s that and I’ll see you next week.

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