01st Jul2020

‘Impact Wrestling’ Review (June 30th 2020)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Impact Wrestling review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we’ve got no more Tessa Blanchard or Michael Elgin in Impact, so the main event is drastically altered, like a Hollywood actress who gets a face-lift to look like Betty Boop…boop-doop-be-doop…boop! Madman Fulton has his second main event in two weeks, which is great for his career, but may not be great for the main event (it’s fine…I checked…through the Veil Of The Force…STAR WARS!!!). The road to Slammiversary continues, right now.

Match #1: Chris Bey w/ Johnny Swinger def. Suicide

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Chris Bey is looking to take out the masked man en route to his X-Division Title opportunity against Willie Mack at Slammiversary. The action is fast and furious in the early going as Bey traps Suicide in the ropes and hits him with a spinning kick. Bey attempts a Moonsault but Suicide avoids him and connects with a big running dropkick. Suicide launches himself off the top rope, taking out both Bey and Swinger with a trust fall to the floor. Bey fakes a knee injury, allowing Swinger to push Suicide off the top. Bey hits the springboard Famouser to win.

My Opinion: 3.2 out of 5 – This was a bunny-in-a-boiling-pot sort of match, in that it was a cute little bunny rabbit, until the boiling water killed it. That comparison made more sense in my head, but perhaps this next sentence will redeem it. Bey and Suicide were making great strides in wrestling a sound, fluid match with logic and action, but the time given to do all this in was too short to capitalize on the ooey-gooey wrestling goodness…love the goodness! Swinger has finally found his niche in Impact, that being the slick, smooth heel manager you love to hate and Bey is a fine guy for him to manage. I was really digging this “hole” thing…get it? I’m not an idiot! I heard that Caleb Konely is playing Suicide, which makes sense, given that this current Suicide seems to be more of a mat wrestler with a lot of flexibility. I think I could be a bitchin’ circus clown, because this was a bitchin’ little match…bitchin’!

Match #2: TJP & Fallah Bahh def. Reno Scum (Adam Thornstowe & Luster the Legend)

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Reno Scum gain the early advantage by attacking TJP and Fallah during their entrance. TJP attempts a springboard kick on Luster but Thornstowe pulls his partner to safety. Reno Scum wear down TJP, preventing him from getting the tag to Fallah. TJP finally turns things around with a head scissors and tags in the big man. Thornstowe launches himself off the back of Luster, connecting with a double foot stomp on Fallah. The match breaks down as Reno Scum blatantly ignores the rules. Fallah hits Thornstowe with a Samoan Drop, followed by the Mamba Splash from TJP to win.

My Opinion: 3.3 out of 5 – Reno Scum may not be great wrestlers, but they do put their back into, so to speak. TJP and Bahh handled the wrestling and RS brought back the S&M look of 1970s/1980s New York gay scene with those outfits! This was one well performed move after another and it was all very visceral. There was a lot of ambitious action here, with more moves of the top turnbuckle than I predicted. Bahh channeled Yokozuna in the right way, using chops and his stable base to establish that he was not easily beaten. Because of how well everybody worked here, I had an easy time taking this match seriously and both of the teams in it.

Match #3: Moose def. Crazzy Steve – TNA World Heavyweight Championship

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Before the match begins, Moose once again forces David Penzer to give a special introduction, this time calling him the best wrestler in the world. Moose swings Steve head first into the steel steps at ringside. Steve appears to be seriously injured after bleeding from the mouth. Steve begins to fight back but gets shut down with a big kick to the gut. Moose attempts a Superplex but Steve bites the face of Moose and counters into a Sunset Flip Powerbomb. Moose catches Steve in mid-air and follows up with a Fallaway Slam. Moose hits the Lights Out Spear to win.

My Opinion: 3.1 out of 5 – This was good fun with Captain Bandana and the Psycho One. Steve worked hard to make the match feel important, in his own bizarre way. Moose did some moves and looked good, while doing his best Cheddar Goblin impression. The action was a lot of big spots and some lock-ups that kept the whole thing qualified as a wrestling match.

Match #4: Kiera Hogan w/ Tasha Steelz def. Havok w/ Nevaeh

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Havok turns her back to Kiera and pays for it as Kiera dropkicks her into the corner. Kiera is on fire and has Havok on the ropes in the early going. Havok uses her strength advantage to toss Kiera across the ring. Tasha hooks the leg of Havok from ringside but Havok kicks her to the floor. Havok hits a series of vicious running boots in the corner. Tasha puts on Havok’s mask, enraging the Kaiju Queen. Tasha tosses the mask to Kiera who hits Havok over the head with it. Kiera connects with multiple Superkicks to win.

My Opinion: 2.6 out of 5 – Hogan and Havoc, which sounds like a rejected name for the Mega Powers, had a decent match that had a nice layout, but just didn’t get built the way you would hope it would be. There was a lot of fire in this pan, but the chicken didn’t get grilled-up all the way. MMMMMMMM…chicken…KABOB! All in all, for a match that didn’t deliver all it could have, there was a glint of greatness now and then and that’s something to be happy about.

Match #5: (Main Event) Madman Fulton w/ Ace Austin def. Trey (Disqualification)

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Madman Fulton continues to wear down Ace Austin’s World Championship opponents before Slammiversary. Trey is out for revenge as he dives through the ropes, taking out Ace on the floor. Trey attempts another dive but Fulton catches him and tosses the Rascal back into the ring. Fulton shows off his freakish strength as he lifts Trey above his head with one arm, then slams him into the mat. Trey tries to get the monster off his feet with a Sleeper. Fulton fights back with a Sidewalk Slam but it’s not enough for Trey to break the hold. Trey soars through the air and hits a Neckbreaker. Fulton is about to put Trey away when Trey clobbers him with Ace Austin’s baton, causing the disqualification.

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was another hit for Fulton and yet another high point for Trey this year. Lots of action was pumped into this bad boy like Boris Johnson and that stupid hair-cut in Mexican Thunderdome. Trey is something else…great wrestler. I didn’t like that this had a DQ, but at least we got top-notch action from two emerging name athletes who have a lot of potential. Sweet beans! This was good shit!

News of The Night:

  1. Eddie Edwards, Ace Austin, Trey and a mystery opponent will fight at Slammiversary in a Fatal 4 Way match for the Impact World Championship.
  2. Eric Young was teased as returning as Super Eric in a vignette where a hand started touching the ring gear of Super Eric. AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! NO, DAMN IT, NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
  3. Tommy Dreamer cut a fantastic promo to call out Moose’s arrogance after Moose attacked him.
  4. Taya Valkyrie and Rosemary will tag together, perhaps to re-activate the Knockout’s Tag Titles (use the damn button you buntubant fools)!?
  5. Jordynne Grace will defend the Knockouts Championship against Deonna Purrazzo at Slammiversary.
  6. Scott D’Amore teased Bullet Club (Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows) coming to Impact.
  7. The North will defend the Impact World Tag Team Championships against Ken Shamrock and Sami Callihan.
  8. Hernandez and The Deaners competed in an arm wrestling contest that Hernandez won.
  9. Trey attacked Madman Fulton and Ace Austin.

Final Verdict: 3.4/5

This had some good stuff in here, but it didn’t focus on it enough. That being said, the build toward Slammiversary is coming along quite fabulously this time and this episode gets some credit for that quality build.

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