11th May2020

Friday Night Smackdown – May 8th 2020: Results & Review

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Friday Night SmackDown review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and the Undertaker intentionally buried the World Championship Wrestling roster because he’s an asshole and we’ve got the final build for Money in the Bank. SmackDown starts…NOOOOOOW!!!!!!

Match #1: Sonya Deville def. Mandy Rose

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Years of tension came to the surface as the two former best friends met in the squared circle on SmackDown. Mandy Rose was on the offensive early, tossing Sonya Deville over the announce table, but Deville landed the most successful maneuver and used a quick rollup to win the match.

My Opinion: 2.9 out of 5 – Well, I’ll be d—–…this was good s—. As an over-all match, this had some problems, but Deville was like a sexy, female Terry Funk with the way she talked ol’ Mandy into a slobbering stupor with the insults. I gotta admit that these two actually got over from doing this match. The action was smart, if not that exciting, but it got the job done for two fighters in the midst of a huge angle that might actually stay huge if things continue to go well.

Match #2: The Miz & John Morrison & The Forgotten Sons def. The New Day & Lucha House Party

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

It was chaotic, it was mesmerizing and it may have just realigned the blue brand tag team landscape heading into WWE Money In The Bank. The New Day & Lucha House Party were flying high with gravity-defying maneuvers, but a quick tag to The Miz caught Lince Dorado by surprise, and a Skull-Crushing Finale brought the fast-paced match to a screeching halt.

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was a nice, long match with some excellent wrestling in it. Look…elephant! There’s some fine stuff in here, like JM kicking every-one like a f—— Rockette on acid. All of the normal multi-team spots are in here, with a few extra ones thrown into the finale to spice it up. Everybody delivered a thrilling performance, like Peter Weller in “Robocop Spanks Dat Ass!” I liked this and rubber-baby-bugger-bumper! There, I bet you didn’t know I was gonna say that?!

Match #3: Tamina & Lacey Evans def. Bayley & Sasha Banks

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Tamina & Lacey Evans might have figured out the formula for halting Bayley & Sasha Banks’ reign over the blue brand. The Sassy Southern Belle rallied with a Woman’s Right to The Boss, and Tamina’s Samoan Drop left the SmackDown Women’s Champion searching for answers ahead of their WWE Money In The Bank title clash.

My Opinion: 2.5 out of 5 – Bayley/Sasha Banks deserve better than matches against Tamina. You beat Jordan’s ass? You good people. Like Crank Yankers with Zac Efron doing all the voices, this was a buncha bull-s—. Why is the Women’s World Champion losing randomly to anyone, even if it is her contender? F— this s—. This match was a waste of time that only had a little bit to love…for me to poop on!

Match #4: (Main Event) King Corbin, Shinsuke Nakamura & Cesaro def. Otis, Daniel Bryan & Drew Gulak

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

King Corbin and his court may have gotten more than what they bargained for when Otis emerged as the mystery partner for Daniel Bryan & Drew Gulak. The royal competitor dug deep to secure the statement win, and the post-match mayhem began in earnest before WWE Money In The Bank. Otis, Bryan and Corbin brawled in the ring, but Corbin towered above the rest heading into the historic match.

My Opinion: 2.4 out of 5 – This made me sad. Corbin is the worst stripper I’ve ever seen…won’t even shake that ass! There’s not too much here to see, but I guess that’s SmackDown for you. There’s a lot of talent in here, but lob-c— took over and did his “I had two great matches last year” bit, the lazy b—-. I gave this 2.4 out of pity, so why don’t you go GameCube your 360 up my Dreamcast until you have to Playstation all over the Collecovision like an Atari.

News Of The Night:

  1. The Hacker was teased as being CM Punk (it’s Bruiser Brody…’cuz I’m full of s—).
  2. Jeff Hardy and Sheamus are feuding over Hardy being a drug-addict who has failed to quit too many times.
  3. Bray Wyatt and Braun Strowman had a promo where Bray tried to get Braun to become his servant again.

Final Verdict: 2.6/5

This was a pain in the ass to watch.

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