03rd Aug2018

‘Impact Wrestling’ Review (August 2nd 2018)

by Nathan Favel

impact-wrestling-header

Welcome to this week’s Impact Wrestling review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have all sorts of things to cover, so let’s do so, before Vince McMahon tries to buy Impact… again.

Match #1: Allie and Kiera Hogan beat Su Yung and the Undead Maid of Honor – Knockout’s Tag Team Match

This was a decent match that had good character work from Yung. Su is really good at playing this Great Muta/Undertaker hybrid that still hasn’t quite found its footing yet. Allie worked hard, but still has trouble standing out from the crowd with this character. Hogan is a refreshing change of pace, at least in the small details. This wasn’t a bad way to open the card.

Match #2: The OGz (Homicide and Hernandez) w/ King beat Ray Steele and Nathan Smokes – Tag Team Match

This was a quick yet brutal squash of a match that looked about as effective as one of these sorts of bouts can look.

Match #3: The Desi Hit Squad beat KM and Fallah Bahh – Tag Team Match

This was a solid match that gave the Desi Hit Squad another good win. I like this team, as they move well and have a certain amount of intensity to them that other duos don’t. The KM/Bahh pair is a fun segment, I guess, but nothing that seems destined to draw any money yet. I wonder why they don’t just promote Bahh as a tough guy, instead of portraying him as a sissy, even though he looks like Yokozuna. I always take booking seriously, because the more you look at things, the more you realize that booking is really quite easy, if you understand who wrestles for you. It appears that the new Impact management doesn’t really get Bahh or how much farther he could go if they took him more seriously. Fortunately, the Desi Hit Squad seems to have a certain amount of respect Don Callis and Scott D’Amore, so they have a good chance at being a top act in the future.

Match #4: Austin Aries beat Dustin Cameron w/ Anthony Carelli – Impact World Championship Match

I never understand why a world title match is placed so low on the card. I don’t care who the challenger or champion is. The World Title should always be the main event. If there is a wrestler who is more important than the title, than put the title on that wrestler and have them fight in the main event. All of my complaining about the placement of this match was quickly lessened by my problems with the match itself. Cameron is not a wrestler I’ve heard of, but this match, which was booked to show Aries as an arrogant champion who did not take his challenger seriously, may serve to ruin the challenger’s reputation before he can even get one. Dressed in his civilian clothes, Aries squashed the challenger and made him look weak. This has been my gripe with squash matches for years, as they do nothing in this day and age but make the loser look feeble while making the winner look pathetic. This match was a waste of time and energy, with more of Cameron’s bumps being punched on his bump card in an affair that will likely not get him over, although I’d love to be wrong. This match may have gotten Cameron on television, but may have also hindered his ability to be seen as important later. Plus, his being grossly out-matched made the whole thing feel like a farce, which is what a Conor MacGregor fight feels like and you don’t need that garbage on any-one’s record. Never-mind the fact that we have Anthony Carelli, the former Santino Marella, playing the part of a coach who sent his student out to certain doom and even said as much on camera while Cameron was walking away. This felt like more of the tripe (don’t I sound like a jack-ass) that used to permeate Impact back when it was TNA. TNA/Impact deserves better than matches like this. Who-ever booked this title match should not do some-thing like this again. This was one of the worst matches of the year.

Match #5: Eli Drake and The Cult of Lee (Trevor Lee and Caleb Konley) beat Grado and Joe Hendry w/ Katarina – Tag Team Match

This was a brief fight that continued one of the dullest rivalries of the year. Drake deserves so much more than this. Trevor Lee deserves so much better than this. Every wrestler involved in this story deserve more than this. Why do bookers still rely on weak story-lines just to keep people on television? Why not just have the roster battle for contention to the world title each week? Why not do what Vince McMahon rarely does and actually make your roster matter?

Match #6: Main Event – Pentagon Jr. and Fenix beat oVe (Jake Crist and Dave Crist) w/ Sami Callihan – Tag Team Match

This was an excellent match that added to the streak of great work these guys have had this year. I’m glad Impact has found some-thing they can hang their hat on this year, because Impact is slowly running out hooks to use, which you can see from the bad booking on this card. Pentagon has become one of the most complete wrestlers around and he knows how to exploit every talent he has. Fenix is a remarkable talent and his chemistry with his brother Pentagon is stupendous. I love oVe and I am glad to see them get this shot at television. Callihan is crazy, I think. Over-all, this was worth watching.

News of the Night:

  1. Tessa Blanchard attacked Allie after he match to continue their feud.
  2. The LAX/OGz feud continued when Ortiz pulled an ax on the OGz. I’m not kidding, this time. They actually used an ax in an angle. It’s a great look, but if nothing comes of that in the coming weeks, then it was a waste of an idea.
  3. Anthony Carelli kicked Austin Aries in the balls.
  4. Eddie Edwards and Austin Aries is being built as a title feud.
  5. The Alisha/Eddie Edwards divorce story-line is being continued and it appears it may be a way of pushing that Eddie is still crazy or has PMS. I don’t get this thing. Why not just have Eddie just wrestle? Eddie has drawn a lot of money with his skills and if he was pushed properly, he wouldn’t need to do this ECW-lite stuff that just doesn’t seem to be his forte.
  6. Gama slapped the Desi Hit Squad, twice.
  7. Killer Kross attacked Anthony Carelli in the back-stage area.

Final Verdict: What the hell is Don Callis thinking? Callis keeps going around and bragging about how good Impact is doing, but it’s just as bad as ever. Slammiversary was great, but it usually is, no matter who is booking. There’s too much garbage wrestling being booked, but without the charm of Paul Heyman’s Extreme Championship Wrestling. It feels more and more like the bookers are just throwing ideas at the wall and hoping they stick. Impact deserves so much more than this. Plus, one of the worst matches of the year occurred on the card, so it automatically gets a bad rating for that. I hope next week is better, because Impact shouldn’t have to go through this any more.

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