WWE Raw – Aug 9th 2021: Results & Review (2nd Opinion)
Welcome to this week’s WWE Monday Night Raw review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and if a plane has 19 passengers and 72 seats, how old is the pilot? The answer is…how the f–k would you know?! I didn’t give you any information to make an educated guess. Don’t give me any bull-s–t about number manipulation! The problem is not fit to be solved! Don’t contend with me! Wakakakakakaka!!!!!!!!!! Shut up and get ready for wresl… wait… WWE… wrestling… HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! No f–kin’ way! I…ow! A f–kin’ coconut hit me on the head! That really hurt! Ow! I’m pissed now! Raw starts now! These t-shirts are too tight Billy!
[Author’s Note: Riddle, who has been accused of rape and has settled the case out of court, has not been found guilty or innocent and if that upsets you then viewer discretion is advised].
Match #1: Drew McIntyre def. Baron Corbin
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
At the request of Jinder Mahal, the increasingly downtrodden Baron Corbin exercised the quarterly brand-to-brand invitational to come over from SmackDown and take on Drew McIntyre in an attempt to turn around his luck. The Scottish Warrior laid in a significant amount of punishment throughout the match and almost convinced Corbin he felt sorry for him. Almost was the key word, as McIntyre proceeded to nail Corbin with the Claymore to pick up the victory and send another stern message to Mahal.
The Verdict: 3 out of 10
Match #2: Karrion Kross def. Jeff Hardy
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
After anticipating it for weeks, NXT Champion Karrion Kross finally got his rematch against “The Charismatic Enigma” Jeff Hardy. Hardy brought the fight, but this time the vicious Kross proved to be too much as he made Hardy fall and pray by forcing him to submit to the Kross Jacket. The closing bell wasn’t enough for the vicious NXT Champion, as he locked in another Kross Jacket on Hardy to further make a statement following the match.
The Verdict: 6 out of 10
Match #3: Alexa Bliss def. Doudrop
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
Eva Marie led Doudrop to the ring to finally go toe-to-toe with Alexa Bliss, but Little Miss Bliss also had someone in her corner, and that someone was Lilly. As the mental war raged, Doudrop eventually made eerie eye contact with the blissful doll, and the result was Lilly pulling off a mind-bending wink, confounding Doudrop to the point of defeat at the hands of Bliss.
The Verdict: 2 out of 10
Match #4: United States Champion Sheamus def. Ricochet
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
Sheamus made sure The Miz & John Morrison stayed far away, as the United States Champion looked to bounce back in one-on-one action against Ricochet. As a master of aerial offense, Ricochet gave it everything he had, including an incredible crossbody onto the announce table, but all it took was one big headbutt and a Brogue Kick from The Celtic Warrior to deliver Sheamus the victory.
The Verdict: 7 out of 10
Match #5: Damian Priest def. John Morrison
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
Damian Priest looked for another big win against John Morrison. America’s Moist Wanted just did not have enough in the tank, as Priest connected with the Reckoning to earn the victory. The Archer of Infamy witnessed The Miz get up from his wheelchair and get out of dodge as quickly as he could after the match to the shock of the WWE Universe, but it wasn’t enough to deter his attention from his real focus: a United States Championship Match against Sheamus at SummerSlam, which The Celtic Warrior gladly accepted.
The Verdict: 4 out of 10
Match #6: T-BAR def. Mustafa Ali
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
After Mansoor presented him with a custom jacket to make up for their loss last week, Mustafa Ali looked to teach his new partner a lesson by attempting to defeat an old one in T-BAR. Ali put up a strong fight, but the massive T-BAR showed his dominance and defeated the former RETRIBUTION leader with a devastating knee to the face. Right after the match, MACE & T-BAR looked to deliver High Justice to Ali, but Mansoor made sure that didn’t happen by fighting off the formidable duo.
The Verdict: 2 out of 10
Match #7: Raw Women’s Champion Nikki A.S.H. def. Rhea Ripley (via DQ)
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
Riding high off her victory against Charlotte Flair in a No Holds Barred Match, Raw Women’s Champion Nikki A.S.H. aimed for another huge win going against her other SummerSlam opponent, Rhea Ripley. What unfolded was an incredibly hard-hitting, back-and-forth match that was eventually interrupted by Flair, who unleashed a vicious attack on both competitors. The Queen then took the opportunity to raise the Raw Women’s Championship high above her head, signifying that she intends to walk out of SummerSlam as a 12-time Women’s Champion.
The Verdict: 5 out of 10
Match #8: Randy Orton def. AJ Styles
The following is courtesy of wwe.com:
Randy Orton came back with a purpose, looking to reestablish his dominance as a solo competitor by putting RK-Bro behind him. His target was AJ Styles, and as a grueling Raw main event ensued, a dejected Riddle emerged to try and win The Viper’s good graces back by jumping all over Omos and causing Styles to be distracted, which actually led to an incredible RKO and victory for Orton. Following the bout, Orton initially showed appreciation for The Original Bro’s assistance with a heartwarming hug, only to drop Riddle with a swift RKO out of nowhere.
The Verdict: 7 out of 10
Major News:
- Elias burned his guitar and is no longer Elias.
- Randy Orton attacked Riddle.
Final Verdict: 4/10
The Iron Shiek: This show the f–kin’ bull-s–t! C–k-sucker assholes! Shieky baby no give a f–k about this bull-s–t matches. The Jeff Hardy lost to Carry-On Kross so the Carry-On not look like a f–kin’ s–t-bag this week! Good for the Jeff Hardy for being the professional. The Carry-On needed a good match and got the good match. Good for the Carry-One Kross. John Morrison stuck doing the s–t squirt comedy s–t with Dominique Priest. Poor bastard man Morry son. Squirt gun? What the f–k?! Nikki Ass win by the DQ. What the f–k?! Why did the match end with the DQ? Who the f–k pay for the DQ finish?! F–k! Vince McMahon keep promoting the s–t booking. Vince need to stop the bull-s–t! I f–k his ass and make him humble! I break his back open and piss in like the toliet! Flush his spine out his ass like the white s–t! The Ricochet worked hard with the Irish and it real hard-hitting action. Working hard is what they do. Irish man no blow s–t out ass when he work with the Ricochet. Harry Bellafonte a no good son of a b–ch! Where the f–k he at now? Sean Olivier have the d–k bag and Harry Bellafonte go in the f–kin’ d–k bag. Baron Corbin goes in the d–k bag. Comb your f–kin’ hair! Drew try to give to the Baron money, but he kick him in the head. F–k you! No good Drew mother-f–ker! F–k you! Mustafa Ali lose to candy bar. Short match bull-s–t. F–k! Rundee beat the AJ, because the Earth not flat. The main event was excellent. AJ worked hard to make the Roondie match a hit. Rambie move around the ring real well. Not a punk b–ch. AJ try to sail to end of the world and fall the f–k off. Geronimo! Great main event that kinda suck for few seconds. Rumbie won the match. Good for Rammee! AJ died in Atlantic Ocean. Dumb f–k! Me: Ummmmmm…what he said. This show had a lot of issues with making the matches a success. You gotta let these things go longer. Well, I’m glad we had this time together. I’ll see you next time.
