21st Jun2021

‘AEW: Dynamite’ Review (Jun 18th 2021)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s AEW Friday Night Dynamite review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we are atop the summit of Mount Fagynah to bury the remains of Necro-Vince in the mountains. We have some big matches to get to… Don West: Wait, Roberto! I sense a disturbance in the kayfabe! Me: It’s N… Mike Tenay: I do too! Stephanie McMahon: Get them! Cesaro: Affirmative! Don West: We have to get away from that MechMahonanoids! Mike Tenay: AJ! Do you have the drop on them? AJ Styles: I’m under attack from two more! Ricochet: Target acquired! Mustafa Ali: Eliminate target! DW: AJ! No! MT: We’re surrounded! SM: My father belongs to me! Soon, he will be resurrected! The Monopologeddon shall be upon us all! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Me: No! SM: Fire missiles! Destroy everything! Me: No! You shall not stop us! Dynamite starts n… BOOM! BOOM! KABLAM! Me: …ow.

Match #1: Jake Hager b. Wardlow – Cage Fight Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

The match took place in a six-sided MMA cage! Wardlow had his back turned to Jake Hager when Hager entered the cage, purposely ignoring him out of disrespect. Hager did a lap around the cage. Hager is 3-0 in his MMA career. Hager tried to grapple Wardlow to the mat but Wardlow sprawled and fended Hager off. Hager pierced the guard of Wardlow with a jab. Hager connected with two kicks to Wardlow’s quads. Wardlow countered by slamming Hager to the mat with a suplex. Hager used hammer fists on Wardlow after a double leg takedown. Wardlow blocked a kick from Hager and caught him with a big right hand. Wardlow rushed Hager and pressed the attack, pushing Hager against the cage. The two big hosses were throwing wild haymakers. Wardlow rocked Hager with a superman punch off the cage! Hager was saved by the bell as the first round ended. Round two began with Hager staggering out of the way from a charging Wardlow. Hager evaded a kick from Wardlow. Hager escaped a crossarm breaker by Wardlow. Hager applied an arm breaker of his own! Hager locked in a triangle, but Wardlow battled out with strikes. Hager transitioned into an ankle lock submission. Wardlow broke Hager’s grip with an up kick. Wardlow powerbombed Hager into the cage and then speared him! Hager locked in a head and arm triangle, trapping Wardlow’s arm. Wardlow slipped out but Hager choke slammed Wardlow! Hager choked out Wardlow, with ref Aubrey Edwards stopping the match. Hager was going to fist bump Wardlow out of a sign of respect, but Shawn Spears assaulted him from behind. Jericho ran in to even up the odds! MJF entered the cage and went immediately after Jericho’s injured elbow. MJF applied the Salt of the Earth! Dean Malenko got into the ring to stop MJF, but MJF coldcocked him with a sucker punch! Sammy Guevara’s music played, and he tried to get a piece of MJF, but MJF retreated from the cage!

The Verdict: 7 out of 10 – As…KAFGK…as fake MMA goes, this was quite good. They mimicked everything from MMA and it really looked right. This was explosive in parts and while there were some issues with being exciting, this was still a fast and consistent display of how to properly do a wrestling/MMA hybrid in pro wrestling. DW: Where are they taking Vince now? MT: They must be going to…Madison Square Garden. The last bastion of hope for their evil plot would be to merge him with the arc reactor in the center of MSG. DW: Then we’ve got to go there! Me: Damn it. I have to finish this review. Oh well. Anyway, this was pretty fun.

Match #2: Men Of The Year b. Darby Allin – Handicap Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Darby slapped Ethan Page as the match began. Ethan Page backed off and tagged in Scorpio Sky. Page caught Sky in a drop toehold and rolled him up for a near fall. Page and Sky double teamed Darby Allin but Darby countered with a Coffin Drop! Page knocked Darby down hard after a massive shoulder tackle. Page was about to throw Darby into the front row, but Darby slid down with a sleeper. Page backed him into the corner and then hip tossed him into the turnbuckles. Scorpio Sky smashed Darby with a backbreaker. Page tagged in and hit a backbreaker of his own on Darby Allin, punishing Darby’s lower back. Sky tagged back in and hit another backbreaker! Page tagged in but Darby rolled up Page in an inside cradle for a near fall! Darby connected with a Scorpion Death drop on Page! Darby blasted Sky with a shotgun dropkick, and then followed up with a Code Red, but Page broke up Darby’s pin attempt. Page picked up Darby and slammed him. Darby zip tied Ethan Page’s feet together and then tossed him to the outside of the ring! Sky charged at Darby, but Darby rolled him up for a two-count! Darby used a stunner and then a Coffin Drop on Sky! Ethan Page pulled Darby out, breaking up the pin attempt on Sky! Page freed himself of the zip ties and then rammed Darby face-first into the steel ring post. Ethan Page hoisted Darby Allin up to the top turnbuckle. Page set up a stalling vertical suplex but Darby bit Page’s hand. Sky knocked Darby down, allowing enough time for Ethan Page to hit the Ego’s Edge on Darby! Ethan Page covered Darby and scored the pin!

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – There wasn’t much here, but Darby took his bumps and MOTY kept a nice pace. DW: We should too! AJ! Fire the thrusters on this air-ship! AJ Styles: AJ do this! AJ do that! AJ want some T&A! MT: Soon buddy! You’ll get a title shot after just a few matches! AJ: Titty shot? Sweet! Me: Overall, for a handicap match, this was decent.

Match #3: Orange Cassidy b. Cezar Bononi

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Bononi grabbed Cassidy by the lapels and tossed him into the turnbuckles. Bononi tore Cassidy’s jean jacket off him. Bononi hoss-tossed Orange across the ring. Outside the ring, Ryan Nemeth used spray tan on Orange, attempting to give him a make-over. Back in the ring, Orange ate a big boot from Bononi! Peter Avalon and Ryan Nemeth brushed Orange Cassidy’s hair on the outside of the ring. They placed Ryan’s jacket on Orange. The Best Friends saw enough! As Kris Statlander distracted the referee, The Best Friends rocketed Orange Cassidy over the top rope, sending him crashing down onto The Wingmen! Cassidy tried for a diving DDT but was caught by Bononi. Cassidy countered with the Stundog Millionaire and then a spinning DDT. After the Orange Punch, Orange Cassidy pinned Cezar Bononi!

The Verdict: 5 out of 10 – This was simple and easy, but perhaps a bit toothless as well. Maybe that explains why this bite was a bit hard to swallow at times? OC carried CB through the lulls of the bout and got to the entertainment spots that OC specializes in. For what it was, it was never too far beyond belief in the grand scheme. DW: We’re getting closer to MSG! MT: I’ll alert Samoa Joe and Daniels! AJ: Are they bringing boobies? Me: Next match.

Match #4: Cody Rhodes/Brock Anderson b. QT Marshall/Aaron Solow

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Brock ducked a punch from Aaron Solow. Brock Anderson used a back heel trip on Aaron Solow. Brock wrenched Solow’s wrist and then stomped on it. QT tagged in but made a hasty retreat when Cody tagged in. Cody found him with a bigtime tope suicida on QT Marshall! Back in the ring, Solow and Marshall double-teamed Cody with some sharp tandem offense. Brock Anderson tagged in and rammed his shoulder into QT in the corner turnbuckles! Brock connected with a gut wrench suplex on Aaron Solow. QT grabbed Brock and caught him off guard with a spinebuster. QT tried for a splash in the corner, but Brock Anderson moved out of the way and got the hot tag to Cody Rhodes! Paul Turner didn’t see the tag, so he forced Cody out of the ring. So QT continued the assault on young Brock Anderson. QT almost hit the Cross Rhodes, but Brock countered with a DDT! Brock crawled to his corner and tagged in Cody. Cody cleaned house on The Factory! Cody applied the figure four leglock on Solow, but Solow grabbed the ropes to break the hold. Cody shocked QT with a Canadian Destroyer! Solow rocked Cody with a corkscrew dropkick! As Cody neutralized QT Marshall on the outside ramp, Brock Anderson tagged in and surprised Solow with a pin for the victory!

The Verdict: 4 out of 10 – This was dull. Brock looked decent here. Cody didn’t do all that much to help the bout out. Really, the only thing worth repeating here was that Brock looks like a smaller version of his dad, which ain’t a bad place to start. MT: Coming up on the Garden! Me: Next match.

Match #5: Penelope Ford b. Julia Hart

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

They locked up and Julia rolled out of the wrist lock from Penelope. She applied a wrist lock too, but Ford took her down with a side headlock. Hart dropkicked Ford and followed up with a crossbody press. Ford retreated to the outside of the ring. Hart got too close, and Ford caught her with a double knee drop. Julie Hart connected with a clothesline. Penelope rolled through, escaped to center, and followed up with a lariat. Ford slapped Hart in the mouth. Ford smashed Hart with a gut buster! Penelope attempted a moonsault press but Hart moved out of the way. Julia went for a splitting leg drop but Ford moved. Ford applied a bridging Indian death lock and left Hart no choice but to tap!

The Verdict: 4 out of 10 – Ford is wresting far better now, but still needs lots of work. Hart did well as the punching-bag. Not much overall, but then again, at least it was better than nothing. DW: Garden in sight! Me: On to the main event.

Match #6: (Main Event) The Good Brothers/Matt Jackson b. Penta El Zero Miedo/Eddie Kingston/Frankie Kazarian

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Frankie Kazarian charged at Karl “Machine Gun” Anderson! He rolled up Karl for a two-count! He followed up with a lariat and then tagged in Penta El Zero Miedo. Matt Jackson was tagged in but Penta El Zero Miedo used sling blades on Matt and Karl! Kingston tagged in, held Matt Jackson back, and Penta El Zero Miedo nailed Matt with a thrust kick to the head! Kingston chopped Matt Jackson’s chest. Doc Gallows tagged in but was knocked off his feet by a shoulder tackle from “Mad King” Eddie Kingston. Kingston battled against Gallows, Anderson, and Jackson, as they all took turn on him. Matt Jackson punched Kingston in the head with closed fist strikes. Eddie Kingston got to his feet and tossed Matt overhead with a belly-to-belly suplex! Kaz tagged in and he connected with a flying forearm to Karl Anderson. “Machine Gun” was going for the spinebuster, but Kaz countered with a cross face chicken wing. Gallows ran in to break it up! Anderson rocked Kaz with the spinebuster! Penta El Zero Miedo and Matt Jackson tagged in for their respective teams. Penta El Zero Miedo took Matt Jackson off his feet after a diving cross body block! He followed up with a backbreaker on Matt! Penta El Zero Miedo launched himself over the top rope and onto The Good Brothers with a tope con giro! Kingston tagged in and all three men on his team worked over Matt Jackson—Penta El Zero Miedo nailed Matt with the Fear Factor package piledriver first. Then Kingston hooked him and planted him with the backdrop driver! Finally Frankie spiked Matt with the Angel’s Wings! Kingston covered Matt but Gallows broke up the pin attempt! Gallows carried Matt-o across the ring and allowed him to make the tag to Karl Anderson. Penta El Zero Miedo was seeking the Fear Factor on Anderson, but Anderson countered with a neck breaker! Gallows tagged in and splashed Penta El Zero Miedo in the corner! Matt Jackson dropped an elbow onto Penta El Zero Miedo! The Good Brothers were about to use the Magic Killer on Penta El Zero Miedo, but Frankie Kazarian ran in to make the save! Kingston entered the fray, blocking a superkick from Matt Jackson and then sending Matt flying with the half and half! Karl Anderson clobbered Kingston with a high boot! Penta El Zero Miedo was there with the backstabber on “Machine Gun.” Suddenly Nick Jackson ran down with the cold spray and blinded Penta El Zero Miedo with it! Karl Anderson pinned Penta El Zero Miedo after a super cutter!

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – You got the spots and you got the moves. This was run-of-the-mill for those who like the Bucks hitting their marks endlessly. Nobody was lazy here, but the match itself was. This was movement. I bet my cat will enjoy looking at it. DW: We’re here! Me: Okay. Here we go.

Final Verdict: 6/10

There’s nothing bad in this show, but it is stagnancy in action. You could miss this and never miss not missing this. I get that there is a desire to hold off on big things until going back to Wednesday’s, but just booking random matches that don’t build toward title shots are just the wrong way to go. If anything, this would have been the time to really commit to singles matches in an effort to rank for the World Title. SM: My father has been merged with arc reactor! He is reborn once more! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! Darth Vince: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! I have the power! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! DW: Oh God! What do we do? MT: There’s no hope! Me: I have a plan. Unleash…Katie Vick! Katie Vick: Hey asshole! You f—ked me in a casket?! DV: That was Hunter! KV: S—t up, pussy! I brought Hoda Kotb with me to expose you for the perv that you are! DV: What?! Consequences…for my actions?! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! Me: That ought to handle it. Everyone knows that rich bastard hates to taken to task for the evil s—t that they’ve done. DW: Great job Humberto! Me: It’s Na…thanks. MT: We’re all free! DW: I’m so happy I could chub the f—k up right now! Me: Ew. Well, that was Dynamite. I’ll see you next time.


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