27th Oct2020

WWE Raw – Oct 26th 2020: Results & Review

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Monday Night Raw review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have Chris Brown’s mom after her face-lift. Holy Bolies! We’ve got water on the moon and Kayne West making an ass out of himself for money. Hey, it’s time to celebrate Randy Orton winning his seven-thousandth World Title. Monday Night Raw starts…well, a little before I actually wrote this review.

Match #1: AJ Styles def. Jeff Hardy – Survivor Series Qualifying Match

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Jeff Hardy and AJ Styles brought their best in an attempt to represent Raw at Survivor Series. Backed up by his towering new associate, The Phenomenal One had some choice words for The Charismatic Enigma and the WWE Universe before the opening bell. Styles was aided by his new friend at ringside, who caught a flying Hardy midway through the match. With the bout hanging in the balance, Styles skied for a Phenomenal Forearm to punch his Survivor Series ticket.

My Opinion: 3.4 out of 5 – This was a nice tease of their usual chemistry. Styles and Hardy have a very handy short-hand with each other that makes their matches pop, no matter the length. It’s that short-hand that we get here, in all its stubby, shiny glory. These guys were able to have a better WWE house style bout than most people do in this day and age. You know what is sad? Your average Randy Orton promo getting more time than a match between marquee names. Fortunately, this match, while not quite on the level that these two are capable of, was still a nice addition to their growing list of matches they’ve had together. This was a good opener that gave enough action to keep you plugged into the wall, but perhaps not enough to turn the light all the way on.

Match #2: Lucha House Party def. Akira Tozawa & Drew Gulak

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Lucha House Party focused their efforts against Akira Tozawa & Drew Gulak until the entrance of 24/7 Champion R-Truth brought mayhem to the WWE ThunderDome. The confident 42-time Champion strolled out to the ring, and a mad scramble ensued for his title. R-Truth sent Tozawa flying over the barricade and was able to escape after Lucha House Party picked up a tag team victory.

My Opinion: 1.7 out of 5 – This some-how became a 24/7 Title match, so that’s your first bit of bad news, in addition to this only go two or so minutes. That being said, they did have a botched pin-fall and a missed high dive become the finish for the actual tag match, so that was clever. Okay, the lipstick is on the pig.

Match #3: Keith Lee def. Elias – Survivor Series Qualifying Match

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Keith Lee overpowered Elias to secure a Team Raw Survivor Series spot. Elias appeared on the verge of throwing a release party on the day of his new album’s “Universal Truth” launch up the charts, but the emergence of Jeff Hardy foiled his plans. Lee used the distraction to deliver a Spirit Bomb to Elias for the win, and The Charismatic Enigma played the final note with a guitar strike to the back of his WWE Hell in a Cell opponent.

My Opinion: 2.7 out of 5 – This was pretty much just Lee throwing Elias around like a Mexican in an ICE deportation bus. I think Elias attacked Lee at some point in this, but the vast majority of this match was Lee stomping all over Elias, probably because Elias’s face looks like one of the creatures from “Shivers”. Well, this was a schlock-fest and the right guy won, so pretty much every election for every elected official that isn’t an ass-hole…yeah right.

Match #4: The Hurt Business def. RETRIBUTION – Tag Team Elimination Match (Disqualification)

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

When RETRIBUTION showed up, Superstars scattered, but The Hurt Business ran straight into the conflict. The Hurt Business imposed their will once again on Raw as Bobby Lashley, Shelton Benjamin, Cedric Alexander and MVP withstood the chaos and stood tall. RECKONING disturbingly entered the fray and created a distraction to help SLAPJACK eliminate MVP to give RETRIBUTION the early advantage. After Shelton Benjamin eliminated MACE, Mustafa Ali was all alone with Benjamin and Alexander. With the odds stacked against the leader of RETRIBUTION, Ali opted for a steel chair attack on Alexander before leaping over the barricade and escaping to avoid The Hurt Business’ wrath.

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This got enough time to shine and managed to make both teams look smart, but having RETRIBUTION lose, even in a DQ, was a bit lame. That being said, the wrestling was pretty vibrant when you consider that it was done in the WWE house style. Shelton was the star here, believe it or not. What, a black man can’t be a big star? Anyway, Shelton was really intense and tough the whole time. Well, you gotta come watch this to see Shelton show why he is good enough to be a World Champion and why there’s a lot of talent. Oh, and Mia Yim pretended to have a flesh-eating virus to cause a distraction. Yeah…well, this was good stuff.

Match #5: Drew McIntyre def. The Miz

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Drew McIntyre got over the loss of his WWE Championship the only way he knows how – by looking for a fight. As the Scottish Superstar addressed the WWE Universe, The Miz & John Morrison interrupted the former champion and entered his crosshairs. Mr. Money in the Bank tried to target the hobbled Superstar after his grueling Hell in a Cell Match, but McIntyre persevered. Despite Morrison’s best efforts to hold him back, McIntyre connected with a shattering Claymore to The Miz and then celebrated his victory with Matthew McConaughey. Alright, alright, alright.

My Opinion: 3.1 out of 5 – Drew smashed ol’ Mizzy boy real hard for having a face like Anna Kendrick in a vacuum (not a bad look, in my opinion). Also, Drew did sell for McMiz on a few occasions, but that’s not what people would normally pay for. Drew won and did so by clobbering Le Miz hard enough so he could never sing those f—kin songs again!

Match #6: Lana def. Nikki Cross, Lacey Evans and Peyton Royce – Fatal 4-Way Match To Join Team Raw

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

After naming the first four members, Adam Pearce declared a Fatal 4-Way Match featuring Nikki Cross, Lacey Evans, Peyton Royce and Lana for the final place on Team Raw. It was controlled chaos throughout as all four competitors left it all in the ring in hopes of securing the last spot at Survivor Series. Ever the opportunist, Lana sprang into action after all three competitors came crashing down off the ropes for the surprise pin. Seemingly not thrilled with the final addition to Team Raw, Nia Jax gave Lana a crushing welcome to the squad by smashing her through the announce table.

My Opinion: 2.3 out of 5 – Lana won a match that was mostly just Cross trying to make her part interesting enough to save the match. Fortunately, much of this was a kinetic exercise in one move after another, even if they weren’t always fun moves to watch. All in all, this was decent, but with Lana winning, it just felt like a con-job, because the one that worked the hardest got shafted in favor of the latest flavor of the month.

Match #7: (Main Event) Sheamus def. Matt Riddle – Survivor Series Qualifying Match

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

It was an explosive battle for the final Team Raw spot of the night between Matt Riddle and Sheamus. The Original Bro left it all in the ring, as he attacked The Celtic Warrior from every angle. Sheamus was more than happy to dish back punishment to his opponent, but Riddle dug deep for an impressive suplex to almost secure the pin. One well-time Brogue Kick stopped The Original Bro’s Survivor Series bid in its tracks, as The Celtic Warrior earned his way onto Team Raw.

My Opinion: 3.6 out of 5 – These two guys smacked each other around like it was Sunday night at Oscar Pistorius’s house. Matt tried to use his pervert legs to kick the taste out of Sheamus’s “I kissed Triple H’s ass” mouth, but it was to no avail. There were no lulls in the action and the speed was constantly increasing. I never would’ve pegged these guys as having so much chemistry together, but that’s what I said about Satan and the schoolgirl and look how that sexy couple turned out. Matt was even mentioned in the commentary as not having many friends in the locker room. Perhaps we’re seeing Matt get the ol’ McMahon de-push? Well, at least this match ended cleanly, like my dookie-a-thon at the McDonald’s.

News Of The Night:

  1. The following matches happen at Survivor Series:
    Randy Orton versus Roman Reigns
    Asuka versus Sasha Banks
    Bobby Lashley versus Sami Zayn
    The New Day versus The Street Profits
    The Men’s and Women’s Survivor Series matches
  2. The teams for the Men and Women’s Survivor Series teams are, so far:
    Men: AJ Styles, Keith Lee, Sheamus, ???, ???
    Women: Lana, Dana Brooke, Mandy Rose, Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler
  3. Angel Garza hit on all of the women and was accepted by Nia Jax.
  4. Randy Orton, Drew McIntyre and Bray Wyatt seem poised for a trios rivalry for the WWE World Title.

Final Verdict: 3.1/5

You’ve got a couple of matches that were good fun, but a lot of this just felt it was nothing more than going through the motions.

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