‘All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite’ Review (Aug 22nd 2020)
Welcome to this week’s All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and this show is on a Saturday, because the basketball be phuckin’ with the schedules. We’ve got Cody defending the title against Brodie Lee in a battle of the WWE mid-card cast-offs. Hey, other stuff will happen…like totally! Are you ready to get some? Okay!
Match #1: FTR (Cash Wheeler & Dax Harwood) def. Private Party (Marq Quen & Isiah Kassidy)
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
“I believed in FTR a lot more last week than I do this week, after that assault on Ricky Morton,” said Jim Ross. “A sneak attack and they used a knee brace to do it,” added Tony Schiavone. Dax and Quen traded arm drags, and then Private Party hit stereo dropkicks on FTR! “Quicker than a hiccup, I can tell you that, and they are controlling the pace,” said J.R. FTR rolled to the outside to get some advice from Tully Blanchard and to regroup. Cash came into the ring and distracted ref Aubrey Edwards while Dax gouged the eyes of Marq Quen. Finally Cash got a legal tag and gave a stiff European uppercut to Quen. Jim Ross noted that FTR are the number one ranked contenders at the moment. Quen and Kassidy were utilizing quick tags in and out of the ring to capitalize on their tandem offense opportunities. Kassidy stretched Dax back and Quen leapfrogged over his partner and landed with a double stomp onto the back of Dax’s head for a near fall! FTR used savvy old school tag team strategies to get Quen into a position where he was outnumbered. They cornered him, dropping him then with a double lariat. “It’s so smart, the way they cut that ring off,” observed Jim Ross. Cash applied a drop toehold on Quen and then Dax dropped a hard elbow, wasting no time. “They like to taunt their opponents,” said Tony Schiavone. “Well they’re not trying to make friends with anybody and that’s what I like about FTR. You’re here to win money. You’re here to win championships,” added Taz. Dax clotheslined Quen while Cash rolled him up, good for a two-count. Cash employed leverage on a tight grip rear chin lock submission right across Quen’s jawline, wearing him down. Marq Quen got to his feet and countered it with a back suplex. Dax was tagged in before Quen could get to his corner for the tag. Dax forced Quen outside the ring. Cash tagged back in and jumped off the apron for a double ax handle, but Quen moved, sending Cash crashing throat-first onto the steel barricade! As Cash ate the guardrail, Quen used the opportunity to get the hot tag to Kassidy! Kassidy fired up with clotheslines and forearms on FTR! He connected with a springboard off the bottom rope, pushing Cash’s throat across the top rope! Kassidy blasted Cash with a side kick off the apron. He followed through with an enziguri on Dax inside the ring, and then a flip-thru stunner over the top! Dax kicked out of a pin just in the nick of time! Marq Quen got a blind tag and hit a cross body off the top onto Dax for another near fall! “We can talk about a clash of styles but this is a damn good tag team match,” said Taz. Quen used an inside cradle on Dax, and Dax narrowly escaped the pin. Dax bridged out of a jackknife cover and attempted to win with a backslide, but Quen pushed out! After a pair of leapfrogs from FTR, Cash planted Quen with a spinebuster! This time Kassidy made the save! “That spinebuster really reminded me of Arn Anderson,” noted Taz. Kassidy tried for a plancha onto Dax but Tully pulled Dax out of the way. Kassidy crashed and paid a steep price for the high-risk maneuver! “FTR is taking over. Now they’re controlling the pace,” said Jim Ross. FTR finished the match with the Goodnight Express on Marq Quen, with Dax grabbing the emphatic pin for the team! “Well they’re 6-0 now, but they earned number six,” commented Tony Schiavone.
My Opinion: 3 out of 5 – This went a while, but it was slow and dull. PP pee-peed all over the place and just did transitions the whole time, while FTR did the actual wrestling. This was mostly just a long demo for how much better FTR is than most tag teams, but that’s not what was needed from FTR either. Nothing was ventured and nothing was gained from this match, but it didn’t look bad while doing it either.
Match #2: Jurassic Express (Luchasaurus and Jungle Boy with Marko Stunt) & The Natural Nightmares (Dustin Rhodes and QT Marshall) def. Lucha Brothers (Penta El Zero M and Rey Fenix) & The Butcher & The Blade
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
As AEW ring announcer Justin Roberts was making the formal introductions, the Lucha Bros and the Butcher and the Blade jumped the opposition, catching them off guard. The Lucha Bros took flight with stereo tope con hilos to the outside! The Lucha Bros singled out QT Marshall with chops, then tossed him back into the ring where the Butcher and the Blade were waiting! They steamrolled QT in the corner with running shoulder blocks. “It’s basically four on one here, guys,” said Tony Schiavone. QT fought back! He hit a handstand off the ropes and followed up with a high kick to the Butcher! He smashed the Blade with a brutal forearm! He tried to jump to the outside onto the Lucha Bros but the Butcher pulled him down before he could make the leap! QT was able to tag out to Dustin Rhodes before incurring much more damage. Dustin paint brushed Butcher and the Blade with rights and then dropped Blade with a lariat! “Dustin Rhodes is as sharp as ever,” noted Tony Schiavone. Dustin connected with a big-time right hand on the Butcher, but he was pulled by the ankles to the outside by Rey Fenix! The Butcher, Rey Fenix, and Penta El Zero M ganged up and stomped on Dustin! Penta El Zero M was tagged in and began blasting Dustin’s hamstrings with devastating round kicks! Rey Fenix tagged in and distracted the referee, cutting Dustin off from the herd. Dustin was in enemy territory, as his opponents kicked and choked him. The ref finally saw what was taking place and stepped in. “Right now Dustin has to somehow, someway, get over to that corner,” said Taz. Rey Fenix had a keylock arm submission on Dustin. The Blade tagged in but Dustin scooped him with a slam! Finally Dustin made it to his team’s corner and tagged in Luchasaurus, who dished out massive boots and thrust kicks to the competition! Jungle Boy ran and launched himself like a rocket through the ropes at the Butcher! And then another dive outside, this time propelling himself at Rey Fenix! Jungle Boy didn’t stop there—he followed up with a tope con hilo on the Butcher and the Blade! “Man, what a daredevil! A lot of aerial artistry,” said Jim Ross. Luchasaurus whipped Penta El Zero M with a roundhouse kick, and then spiked him with a chokeslam! Luchasaurus hit a standing moonsault onto Penta El Zero M for a near fall! Butcher tagged in and rammed into Luchasaurus with a shoulder tackle. “Battle of the bulls right there,” said Taz. Butcher was forced down to one knee and Luchasaurus tried for the Shining Lizard, but Blade interfered with a stunner. Butcher ran his shin into the face of Luchasaurus. QT flipped over the rope and then used a diamond cutter on Butcher! Penta El Zero M surprised QT with a sling blade maneuver! Jungle Boy entered the fray once more with a swinging DDT onto Penta El Zero M! Dustin came back in too, but the Lucha Bros caught him with a Canadian destroyer! Penta El Zero M was setting up Jungle Boy for the package piledriver when Blade tried to get his attention for a combo as he was climbing to the top turnbuckle. Penta El Zero M released Jungle Boy and looked puzzled at Blade, asking, “What are you doing?” He pushed Blade, and the referee counted this as a legal tag. They argued and pushed one another until Penta El Zero M shoved Blade hard into Jungle Boy, who was then able to roll up Blade for the victory! The Butcher and the Blade and the Lucha Bros kept shoving each other after the match, upset over the loss. “Man, this is disintegrating in a hurry between Butcher and the Blade and the Lucha Bros,” said Jim Ross.
My Opinion: 3 out of 5 – This was standard fare for a multi-man match. They did the moves, the spots and the stunts, but it just fell flat, like Zooey Deschanel’s career. Zooey? Zooey?! ZOOEY! ZOOEY?! What kind of a stupid name is that? At least this match was better than Zooey Deschanel’s name, but not by much!!!
Match #3: The Elite (Kenny Omega and Nick & Matt Jackson—The Young Bucks) def. Dark Order’s Alex “3” Reynolds, John “4” Silver, & Alan “5” Angels
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
Nick Jackson began with a wristlock and then a dropkick on Alan Angels. Nick almost got caught with a rana from Angels, but he blocked it and showed off his agility by leaping off the center of the top rope with an arm drag on Angels. Matt Jackson tagged in and the Bucks took down Angels with a double dropkick! They took out the other two members with dropkicks too! Matt executed two beautiful Northern lights suplexes before the other two Dark Order members saved their partner from a third suplex! It didn’t matter though, as Matt double suplexed them by himself! Matt tagged Nick who then instantly tagged in Kenny, so they could triple team Alan Angels. “Here comes Kenny Omega and it’s just combo city right there,” said Taz. The Dark Order broke up Omega’s pin attempt. The Bucks went over the top with stereo planchas to isolate Kenny in the ring with Angels. Kenny kept chopping at Angels, knocking him down after a chop and then picking him right back up to hit him with another! Kenny was about to jump off the turnbuckle when Silver grabbed his ankle to stop him. Kenny was knocked to the arena floor and he was blasted with a metal chair that was kicked at his head. Reynolds placed the chair on top of Kenny’s abdomen and Alan Angels jumped off the ring apron and stomped down onto it! Matt Jackson came out to check on Kenny. Silver lifted Matt Jackson up in a vertical suplex position and then Reynolds jumped from the ring onto them! “Matt Jackson went down headfirst!” said Schiavone. Angels covered Kenny for a near fall. Angels was having a field day kicking Kenny. He went for a double stomp but Kenny moved and clotheslined Angels. Kenny rolled forward and tagged Nick Jackson, who cleaned house with superkicks, foot stomps, and a backstabber for good measure! “Nick Jackson is awesome at stringing move after move after move together,” noted Taz. Nick and Matt Jackson used a shotgun dropkick bulldog combo on Reynolds! Omega tagged in but it may have been a bit too soon, as the Dark Order utilized exceptional and effective triple offense on him! “Amazing offensive sequence right there that somehow Kenny Omega survived,” said Jim Ross. Kenny rallied back with snap dragon suplexes on the Dark Order and then a V-trigger to the face of Reynolds! Matt Jackson tagged in and the Bucks were going for the Meltzer Driver when the Dark Order members reversed it and hit piledrivers! Kenny saved Matt from a pin! Angels backflipped off the top rope but the Bucks stopped him with superkicks! Kenny and the Bucks executed an assisted IndyTaker, and then Kenny followed up with a one-winged angel on Angels for the victory!
My Opinion: 3.1 out of 5 – This was a lot of bumps, spots and stunts that looked great, but didn’t quite come together as it should have. So much of this just felt like a glorified squash that I…A SQUASH?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! I…damn it! You have so many great wrestlers in here, but you just go with the squash dressed in crushed velvet that was this match? Hey, but it’s moves, right? Everybody likes moves, right? Well, I guess I just expected more out of a match with this many skilled wrestlers in it. Next time, why don’t you just let the wrestlers wrestle, instead of just trying to be clever and “telling a story”?
Match #4: Darby Allin def. Will Hobbs
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
Darby approached the ring and heathen kicked his opponent straight out of the ring! Darby sprinted through the ropes and crashed into Hobbs. Back in the ring, Darby jumped off the top rope but Hobbs caught him! Darby escaped Hobbs’ grasp and chop blocked his leg. This angered Hobbs, who backdropped Darby high up before gravity took over! Hobbs got a near fall on Darby. Hobbs used a fierce spinebuster on Darby for another near fall. Darby was finally able to counter Hobbs with a cutter, then a springboard elbow!
My Opinion: 2.2 out of 5 – A SQUASH?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! DAMN IT!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Match #5: Ivelisse & Diamante def. Nightmare Sisters—Brandi Rhodes & Allie (with Dustin Rhodes and QT Marshall) – The Deadly Draw Women’s Tag Team Cup Tournament Finals
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
Veda Scott joined Taz, Jim Ross, and Tony Schiavone for this match at the broadcast booth. Shaul Guerrero was the special guest ring announcer. Brandi walked to the ring holding two “Lil’ Bran Bran” AEW action figures. Brandi and Ivelisse began the match for their respective teams. Brandi reversed a wristlock, applied a headlock on Ivelisse, and then took her to the mat with a side headlock. Brandi rolled through for a stacked pin but Ivelisse escaped it. “This feels historic,” said Veda Scott. Ivelisse began chopping and kicking at Brandi, getting Brandi down to one knee. She hit Brandi near the throat with a thrust kick! Diamante was tagged in and they began double teaming Brandi with knee strikes and then a double hip toss. Brandi kicked out at one and tagged in Allie. Allie hit consecutive knee strikes on Diamante before Diamante took her town with an arm drag. Veda Scott added on commentary that she believes Brandi’s attitude is changing. “That whole Nightmare Family thing is getting out of hand if you ask me. Last week you had a huge entourage with Cody. I mean it was ridiculous,” said Jim Ross. Brandi stomped on Diamante and made a quick tag to Allie, who then clotheslined Diamante. Brandi was tagged back in and pulled Diamante’s face across the top ring rope! “Very aggressive move by Brandi,” said J.R. Brandi got a near fall on Diamante after a sharp, hard kick to Diamante’s face! Allie was tagged in and was going for a superplex, but Diamante fought out of it and pushed her to the mat. She followed up with a tornado suplex on Allie! Finally Ivelisse was tagged in and she ran through the opposition, sending Brandi and Allie to the mat with lariats. Ivelisse had a claw hook on Brandi and pushed her down for a near fall. Brandi connected with a stiff right hand to Ivelisse and then speared Diamante! Allie took Diamante “down the Rabbit Hole” but Ivelisse broke up the pin attempt. Diamante dropped Allie with a nasty forearm and tagged in Ivelisse. QT Marshall jumped on the ring apron to distract Ivelisse. Brandi put double underhooks on Ivelisse but Brandi was backdropped out of the ring onto QT! Ivelisse pinned Allie after a snapmare roll-up/kick combo! Madusa was on hand to present the championship cup to the tournament winners!
My Opinion: 2.8 out of 5 – This was decent, but the nearly ten minute bout never got to be much more than a commercial for Brandi holding her action figures and her whole family’s various storylines that are ongoing. The winners worked hard to make something out of this, but they didn’t get much help from the booking. The whole match was a through the motions deal to get Brandi her spots and…that’s it. Allie was here…better than Brandi. I like Brandi, but she p*sses me off, as she makes the whole thing all about her, knowing full-well she can’t deliver what she promises. Well, what’s done is done and the right people won, so I am happy about that.
Match #6: (Main Event) Brodie Lee def. Cody (with Arn Anderson) – TNT Championship Match
The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:
Cody got a quick start, charging right at Brodie, kicking him into the corner turnbuckles. “Good strategy,” said Tony Schiavone. The offense was short lived. Brodie pushed Cody back to create distance and hit a high dropkick! Brodie picked up Cody and tossed him over the top rope to the arena floor with ease! Brodie hurled Cody into the guardrail! “Let’s think about the ribs and how they’ve taken a beating the last few weeks,” said Schiavone. Brodie ran with a big boot to Cody’s head! Back in the ring, Brodie rammed his shoulder into Cody, and then sent him flying with a half-and-half back suplex! “Arn Anderson is very concerned obviously, as he should be. This does not look good for the champion,” observed Jim Ross. Brodie hit a nasty German release suplex on Cody. Brodie followed up with two thrust kicks that nearly took Cody’s head off! Cody was barely able to kick out of the pin. Brodie powerbombed Cody not once but twice! Brodie connected with a discus lariat and pinned Cody! “I can’t believe this!” said Jim Ross. And new TNT Champion—Mr. Brodie Lee! “He went right through Cody!” added Taz. “I’m shocked that Cody got shut out,” replied J.R.
My Opinion: 2.6 out of 5 – This was…A SQUAAAAAAAAAASH?!?!?!?!?!?!?! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! DAMN IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!!!! I HATE THIS LEAGUE! I HATE ‘EM! I HATE ‘EM! I HATE ‘EM! I…well, at least they can get away with Lee squashing Cody, thanks to the push he’s gotten. I…blow me Tony!
News Of The Night:
- The NWA Women’s World Champion Thunder Rosa appeared on DYNAMITE to challenge Hikaru Shida for the AEW Women’s Title at ALL OUT.
- MJF and his lawyer cut a terrible promo on Jon Moxley signing a contract to not use his finisher at ALL OUT, after he cut a promo where he hinted that his wife (Renee Young) may be coming to AEW.
- Ricky Starks cut a great promo after he pretended to be and then assaulted Darby Allin, with the help of Brian Cage.
- Eddie Kingston formed a faction with The Lucha Bros. and The Butcher And The Blade.
- Kenny Omega is being teased as going crazy when hurt, thanks to attacking The Dark Order with a chair after he had been hit by one.
- Brodie Lee beat the piss out of Cody after the main event in a great spectacle that made no sense if you were paying attention.
Final Verdict: 2.6/5
This was a weak show that relied on promos and angles too much, while it also failed to deliver the kind of wrestling action that you’d wanna watch. On a night when they had it all to themselves, AEW blew it.