Nerdly » ‘Easter Bloody Easter’ VOD Review

27th Mar2024

‘Easter Bloody Easter’ VOD Review

by Jim Morazzini

Stars: Diane Foster, D’Andre Noiré, Kelly Grant, Zach Kanner, Allison Lobel, Adam Slemon, Zuri Starks, Jamie B. Cline | Written by Allison Lobel | Directed by Diane Foster

Look what’s come hopping down the bunny trail just in time for the holiday weekend, Easter Bloody Easter, the latest in the never-ending line of holiday horrors. We’ve already had our share of Easter-themed films from Faster Eater Bunny, Kill! Kill! and Easter Holocaust to Resurrection. But when it comes to low-budget horror, there’s no such thing as too many films on a subject, so what’s one more?

This one opens with a couple going at it in a church storeroom, “I want you to fuck me like some muffin top Jesus!”, being killed by a glowing-eyed rabbit that transforms into a glowing-eyed monster complete with Easter basket.

A week later Jeanie (Diane Foster; Bound X Blood: The Orphan Killer 2, Verotika) wakes up in her yard and tries to call her husband Lance (D’Andre Noiré; Sammy Slick: Vampire Slayer, Swamp Woman) who has been missing for a week. Her friend Carol (Kelly Grant; SARS-29, Sleepless Night in the Middle of Nowhere) stops by to pick her up for the funeral of their hairdresser, another victim of the wave of murders plaguing Warburg and threatening the annual Easterpalooza festivities.

When Lance’s truck is found looking like it hit something large, but with no trace of him or whatever he hit, Jeanie, Carol and Lance’s friend Sam (Zach Kanner; Fried: The Autobiography of Louie B. Mayer, See You Next Christmas) a literal tin foil hatted conspiracy nut decide to go looking for him themselves. But do they have what it takes to take on the shape-shifting Jackalope, and its army of killer bunnies?

Easter Bloody Easter is the directorial debut of its star Diane Foster and the first script from actress Allison Lobel (Paralysis, Whine Party) who plays Mary Lou, head of the town’s church committee. And for first-timers, they do a surprisingly good job, as long as they keep the film on track and don’t try to get overly serious.

You would think a film about a wererabbit and killer bunnies straight out of Monty Python and the Holy Grail or Cute Little Buggers wouldn’t have that problem. But with an hour and forty-three minute running time, Easter Bloody Easter does start to bog down in itself during the final act. And that is still preferable to the song and dance interlude that stops the film dead around the midway point.

But it is quite amusing while it’s parodying small-town life and genre tropes such as Mayor Lou (Adam Slemon; Bloodsucking Bastards, Was It Rape Then?) who won’t let anything get in the way of Easterpalooza profits and Megan (Zuri Starks; Rustin, No More Goodbyes) a former Miss Teen Walburg turned professional Jackalope slayer. Starks also gets to deliver a nice riff on Terminator 2’s most famous line.

Those two elements drive Easter Bloody Easter’s plot, and they work nicely together. The whodunit, or maybe I should say who is it, aspect of the story feeds off of the townspeople acting like idiots and/or assholes. Which one of them is both nasty enough and intelligent enough to have become the creature? And why? For once, the answer isn’t glaringly obvious, either.

The film’s effects reflect its low budget and not-so-serious outlook. The killer rabbits look like they came from Walmart’s toy department and given red eyes to make them look demonic. The jackalope is actor Jamie B. Cline (Betrothed, Freedom on the Range) in a suit, but most of the carnage he causes is, unfortunately, computer-rendered. Even cheesy-looking practical effects would have fit Easter Bloody Easter’s vibe better.

Some excellent performances help make up for Easter Bloody Easter’s flaws. The cast was obviously into their roles and having fun making the film. Unfortunately, they can’t entirely overcome the weak effects and overlong running time. The result is a film that, while not as good as it could have been, is still worth seeing.