13th Sep2021

‘AEW: Rampage’ Review (Sept 10th 2021)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s AEW: Rampage review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and I vote me…to kick my ass! Ow! Take that me! Ow! You son of a bitch! Rampage starts now!

[Author’s Note: Darby Allin, who’s been accused of rape, is on this show and if that alarms or upsets you, then viewer discretion is advised].

Match #1: Andrade El Idolo (w/ Chavo Guerrero) def. PAC

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

The Verdict: 8 out of 10 – This was a damn good match. It was worth waiting for. Both fighters worked well together and delivered the kind of fast, aerial action that blended the more modest kind of wrestling that you might find in a WWE match with the raucous mayhem many were expecting. Measured is a word I’d actually attribute to this bout. You get equal parts stunts and strikes being mixed into this Poop Deck Pappy. What can you do with a match that is a whole heaping helping of delicious? You gotta love it…Fred. Fred’s ridin’ Fred ridin’ Fred ridin’ Fred…just ridin’ a fabulous maaaaaaaaaaatch!!!!!!! You gotta love this. You have to! As I said, it was worth waiting for. Senor Winces: Sallright? Me: Sallright!

Match #2: Ruby Soho, Kris Statlander & Riho def. Britt Baker, Jamie Hayter & Rebel

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – This moved around pretty well, like a baby in a burlap sack. Karen: Oh my God! That’s offensive! Me: The baby plays with my sack because it’s warm and squishy! Karen: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! Me: What a goofy lady. She’s getting upset about a baby playing with a warm and squishy burlap sack. Dumb-ass. Soho and Baker were the big stars here. I don’t need to say that, but I need to fill space in this mamajama, so I said it. Kris being an alien is a crock of s–t, so when I see her do well with her grappling, I jump for joy! Jump! Riho is a feisty bugger, isn’t she? Riho bounded about the canvas like a jittery artist. Imagine painting beautiful landscapes with head-butts and drop-kicks. It’d look like Antarctica flooded by the La Brea tar pits! Harry Carey: Hey bozo! That’s my line you son of a bitch! Me: It was a fun match that had lots of good moves and not much else, but it was all fast enough to be empty calories.

Match #3: (Main Event) Brian Pillman Jr. def. Max Caster

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – I was talking to a friend of mine and he said I was a schmuck. I told him “You don’t even know what that means, you putz.” He said, “What’s a putz?” I said, “It’s a schmuck you dick.” Max Caster could very well be the schmuck in this scenario, if his promos are any indication. Brian kicked Max’s leathery ass! What is it about AEW and Maxes being ass-holes? I mean…he wears headphones! Brian had a showcase here that was worth his time and worth ours. Brian put the effort into the action here, as it was his big singles moment in AEW and in his hometown no less. Max took his beating and put over the top prospect that is Brian Pillman Jr. The booker-man did well here. It felt right having Brian come in and trounce Max, even if it was just a few minutes of action. Overall, this was not bad, but it was disappointing as a competitive main event. That being said, at least Brian winning was a happy ending in the right location.

Final Verdict: 6/10

With promos from Adam Cole, Darby Allin, Sting, Tully Blanchard and Bryan Danielson, this was a show that leaned on the card and an angle where Andrade attacked Chavo Guerrero to end their partnership…I think. Chavo attacked PAC with an iPad, that most odious of weapons, and cost Andrade a clean victory. Shawn Spears attacked Darby Allin for Tully Blanchard to set-up the feud between those three and Sting. Come for the first match and have a great time. The rest is enjoyable in a flimsy sense. There’s nothing wrong with that. At least this was an easy hour. Kapow! See you next time!

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