31st May2021

‘AEW: Dynamite’ Review (May 28th 2021)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s AEW: Dynamite review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have some groovy matches. Now, let’s enjoy some wrestling. Wait a minute…there’s an envelope in here from Seth Rogen, Snoop Dogg and Kevin Nealon, with post-marking subsidised by notable publication High Times. I wonder what’s in this envelo………………………………oh s–t man! There was weed smoke in that f–ker man! Oh s–t! I’m gonna eat a whole pig man! I’m gonna eat Babe man! Oh s–t! Oh s–t! Goin’ to Mars dude! Dynamite! TNT! Boom!

[Author’s Note: Darby Allin, who was accused of rape and not yet found guilty or innocent in a court of law, is on this show and if that upsets or alarms you, then viewer discretion should be advised].

Match #1: Darby Allin def. Cesar Bononi

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Bononi backed Darby into the turnbuckles. Darby fought out and was looking for an armbar early on. Cezar Bononi used a hoss toss, hurling Darby halfway across the ring. Bononi hoisted Darby up but Darby countered by slipping over the top and applying a sleeper. Darby smacked Cezar in the back of the head with open-hand palms! Darby connected with a stunner and then a shotgun dropkick on Bononi. He followed up with the Coffin Drop and pinned Bononi! With Sting beside him, Darby Allin called out Ethan Page and Scorpio Sky. The Wingmen ambushed Sting and Darby Allin from behind! Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page then joined the fray! Page and Sky were about to “Pillmanize” Sting’s ankle with a steel chair when the Dark Order sprinted out to even up the odds. Ethan Page and Scorpio Sky retreated!

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – This was pretty good. Allin is a psycho and just wants to get punished for pleasure. Please sir, may I have another? No. Bononi has been dealing with the issue of his family member getting medical help. I hope that is going well. As for his wrestling, Bononi did well here. Good old-fashioned grappling was the order of the day here. I liked this. It was not…Bononi. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! What a lousy pun. What wasn’t lousy was this match.

Match #2: Adam Page def. Joey Janela

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Page hit a shoulder tackle and then used a nice side headlock to take down Janela. Page chopped “The Bad Boy” in the turnbuckles. Janela retaliated with chops of his own and then strutted. The showboating didn’t pay off for Janela as Page caught him with a snap suplex. Janela hit a thrust kick on the apron and then tried for a lateral press on the outside, but Page countered with a fallaway slam! Janela almost got dropped by the Dead Eye, but he pulled Page’s tights. Janela hit a snapping German suplex and then headed up top. Janela blasted Page with a massive diving elbow. Page used a pop up powerbomb and then the Buckshot Lariat for the pin! Page was gushing blood from a stiff shot he’d taken from Janela during the match.

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – This was a good bout that saw Page do some good wrestling, but not really stand out like he’s done in the past. Joey has regressed quite a bit since coming to AEW, but he has his moments of reprieve like in this bout. That being said, I was disappointed that this wasn’t better. All in all, this was a fun bout.

Match #3: Jade Cargill def. Kilynn King

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Earlier in the day Tony Schiavone interviewed Jade. Matt Hardy interrupted the interview and asked if Jade was going to join his winning team. Mark Sterling walked out and said he signed Jade already, and she smiled. For her match, Jade was accompanied to the ring by Mark Sterling. They began with a test of strength knuckle lock. Jade booted King! Jade caught King’s crossbody attempt and curled her, before dumping her down hard on the mat! Jade threw King aggressively to the outside of the ring! King tried to climb back into the ring, but Jade slugged her. Jade hoisted up King, planted King with her Jaded finisher, and then pinned her!

The Verdict: 2 out of 10 – Jade smashed King in a squash. Okay. Enough of that s–t.

Match #4: Miro def. Dante Martin -TNT Title Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

The match started with a collar and elbow tie up until Miro battered Dante into the corner. He tossed Dante overhead with a suplex! Miro followed up with a kick in between Dante’s shoulder blades. Dante hit a jawbreaker, but Miro followed up with a hip throw. Dante connected with a springboard moonsault, but Miro kicked out at the 1-count! Dante went back to the well for a springboard shotgun dropkick! But Miro couldn’t be held down. Miro rocked Dante with a thrust kick right to the temple! Miro wrenched back with the Game Over submission and forced Dante Martin to tap out! Jake “The Snake” Roberts walked out on the ramp with “The MurderHawk Monster” Lance Archer. Jake said they had enough of Miro bullying people around. Jake told Lance to kick Miro’s ass! Lance ran down and booted Miro! AEW referees had to separate the men and clear the ring.

The Verdict: 4 out of 10 – Miro smashed Dante in a squash. Great. Just what I always wanted. A squash.

Match #5: (Main Event) Scorpio Sky/Ethan Page def. Dark Order

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

After back and forth between Sky and Evil Uno, Stu Grayson tagged in. Uno and Grayson isolated Ethan Page in the corner. Grayson dropped a big elbow on Page, and then he connected with a senton over the top. Scorpio Sky ran over and swept out Grayson’s leg! Grayson landed awkwardly on the edge of the ring. Sky followed up with a dynamic cutter on Grayson. Sky was looking for the TKO, but Grayson escaped and spiked Sky in the center of the ring. Grayson rattled Sky and Page with a back-flipping kick. Uno tagged in and was firing on all cylinders! He cleaned house on Page and Sky! Uno flatlined Scorpio Sky. He followed up with a hanging neck breaker on Page. Dark Order employed efficient tandem offense and connected with their cannonball 450 combo! Page kicked out at the two-count! In the mix, Page was able to get back to his feet. He pancaked Evil Uno with the Ego’s Edge and then pinned him! After the match, Darby Allin walked out with an army of men dressed up like Sting! Scorpio Sky dispatched of some of them until he got to one of them who actually was the real Sting! Ethan Page and Scorpio Sky retreated from the ring and from Sting and Darby Allin!

The Verdict: 6 out of 10 – This was a nice little main event that didn’t feel like a main event, but it did work as a showcase of a team meant to fight Sting and Darby Allin at at major Pay Per View soon. There were some wild slams and a lot of energy vibrating through this one. While no masterpiece, this was a folk art post card that had a pretty little picture printed on it that said “Wish You Were Here” and was exciting enough to make you feel as such.

Final Verdict: 5/10

As a wrestling show, this was anemic. As a final sell for Double For Nothing, this was quite good, but since this show relied on promos to do that final pitch, that works against this particular show. The Inner Circle talked and brawled with The Pinnacle. Miro and Lance Archer talked and brawled. Britt Baker just talked. Sting and Darby Allin brawled with everyone and even managed to dress up a bunch of people like Sting to…do so? This show felt very much like an idealised version of a WWE go-home show, rather than an AEW wrestling card before a huge event. AEW is still struggling to have an identity and this show puts that sad fact very plainly. Hell, Eric Bischoff was here referencing The New World Order on a night where Cody Rhodes spectacularly failed to replicate a boxing weigh-in while Adam Page and Brian Cage had to take 30 seconds to explain why they now get to fight each other on PPV. Oh. Kenny Omega Terry Taylored himself again by playing a moron again. PAC is a heel for some reason. Orange Cassidy was teased as champion. Why is the World Title playing second fiddle to the Stadium Stampede match? The Casino Battle Royal was an afterthought here as well. AEW is not a bad league, but it is constantly disappointing, like it was here. I hope Double Or Nothing is a good show. That being said, I’d like it if Dynamite would be as consistently enjoyable as it was in the beginning. Okay. I’m done. I’ll see you next time.

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