13th Nov2020

‘All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite’ Review (Nov 11th 2020)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s review of All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and in honor of the American holiday, Veteran’s Day, I bring an excerpt of my interview with the talking parrot, McSkippy:

Nathan: Nice to meet you, McSkippy!
McSkippy: Shoo!
Nathan: What?
McSkippy: Shoo!
McSkippy: Shoo!
Nathan: Are you telling me to “shoo”?!
McSkippy: Shoo!
McSkippy: Shoo!
Nathan: You shoo! You shoo!
McSkippy: Shoo!
Nathan: Shoo!
McSkippy: Shoo!
Nathan and McSkippy: Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!

That f—kin bird pissed me off! Tell me to shoo! I told him to shoo! Well, here comes Dynamite, which I will not tell you to shoo from. I…what the… McSkippy: Shoo! Nathan: You little son of b—ch! You shoo! You shoo! McSkippy: Shoo! Nathan and McSkippy: Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!

Match #1: Brian Cage def. Matt Sydal

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Sydal has won five of his past six matches. Sydal connected with a sliding dropkick on Cage, but Cage outmuscled him. Cage hurled Sydal into the corner and followed up with a belly-to-belly suplex. Cage hip tossed Sydal into a backbreaker! “Look at the poise of Cage. That’s the poise of a veteran,” noted Taz. Sydal flipped over Cage in the corner, but Cage followed up with a lariat. Cage performed biceps curls with Sydal and then tossed him overhead! Sydal fired back with kicks and chops, but once again, Cage powered out. Cage went for a hurracanrana but Sydal reversed it with a powerbomb! Sydal jumped off the top rope with a meteora onto Cage on the ramp! Sydal used the “question mark” kick and a standing moonsault but Cage kicked out at the two-count! Sydal ducked a discus lariat but Cage caught him with a short clothesline! Cage attempted a suplex but Sydal countered with a hurracanrana for a very near fall! Sydal ran to the top rope and rocketed towards Cage, but Cage caught him, snatching him out of midair with the drill claw! That was more than enough for Cage to pin Sydal.

My Opinion: 3.8 out of 5 – This was excellent wrestling from two of the best today. Cage and Sydal had a furious thunder in their boots and they made sure we knew about it. Wrestled in a way that looked like they had a chip on their shoulders, this was a blast of fire that nearly singed the eyes just from having had watched. Sydal was competitive to the point of looking like he could win, but this was booked to be Cage’s match, as it should.

Match #2: Natural Nightmares (Dustin Rhodes & QT Marshall) def. The Butcher & The Blade (with The Bunny) – Bunkhouse Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

QT tried to strip off his belt but the Blade grabbed it and started to whip him with it. On the outside, Dustin gave the Butcher a face buster on a steel chair! The “Natural Nightmares” set up a table, but Blade smashed a guitar over QT’s head! Dustin Rhodes had a bull rope with a cowbell and went after Blade, but the Butcher rammed a chair to Dustin’s head! Bunny jumped to the apron and handcuffed Dustin to the ropes! Butcher and the Blade had QT outnumbered and slung him into a ladder that was propped in the corner turnbuckles. QT was busted wide open by this point! “Nothing but chaos and calamity! This match has no rules, no time limit, no count out,” said Jim Ross. Dustin Rhodes escaped one of the handcuffs and released some flip, flop and fly on Butcher and the Blade. He lashed Butcher with a Singapore cane! Dustin hit a bulldog off the ramp onto plywood down below. The Blade and QT Marshall slugged it out in the middle of the ring! QT smacked a bloodied Blade with the lid of a garbage can! QT climbed to the top of the ladder and dropped an elbow down across the throat of the Blade, and somehow the Blade kicked out! Butcher and Dustin joined them back in the ring. The Blade took a steel chain and ran with it across Dustin’s throat. Butcher and the Blade hit “full death” on Dustin on two chairs, but QT made the save for his partner! QT dodged a clothesline from the Butcher and countered with a diamond cutter. QT tried for a diamond cutter on the Blade but the Blade blocked it. The Blade grabbed a chair and QT elbowed the chair, knocking it into the Blade’s head—which knocked the Blade into the Bunny. The impact sent the Bunny flying off the apron and crashing through the table set up at ringside! Dustin grabbed the cowbell and nailed Blade with it, and then QT finished off Blade with a diamond cutter and the “Natural Nightmares” scored the victory!

My Opinion: 3.7 out of 5 – This was good for the carnage. Don’t go looking for explicit psychology here, but you gets basics: pain hurts, pain hurts…ow ow ow ow ow. There’s a lot of blood here…a lot. If you have been craving an old school brawl to the death, than this match will offer that to you in spades. There’s big bumps, big spots and big stunts, with enough crimson masks being worn to make even the most ardent mask wearers comfortable enough to watch these guys, like, totally no social distance…TOTALLY!!!!! John Nance needs a hair-cut and this match was allllllllllriiiiiiight!!!!!!

Match #3: Shawn Spears (with Tully Blanchard) def. Scorpio Sky

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Sky is 12-3 in his past 15 matches. Sky connected with a big elbow strike to Spears’ jaw! Spears went outside to the floor to collect himself but Sky followed him out there and bit him, and then delivered a running lariat. They returned to the ring and Sky climbed to the top turnbuckle. Spears ran and met Sky up there, then suplexed Sky back down to the mat! Spears looked for C4 but Sky clotheslined Spears to the outside. Sky slingshot himself over the top rope with a cross body block to Spears. On the outside of the ring, Spears hit a thrust kick on Sky, and then dropped him back first on the edge of the steel ring steps! In the ring, Sky rallied back and applied the scorpion death lock. Tully Blanchard left the steel slug from Spears’ glove on the ring apron, and while the referee was distracted, Spears put the slug inside his leather glove. Tully Blanchard tossed a slug to Scorpio Sky too, but Sky didn’t want to win that way and chucked it away. When Sky turned around, Spears blasted him with the loaded glove and then pinned him for the three-count!

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was a hit, but not as much of a hit as you’d expect from a ball that got knocked across the field by the bat at full speed. Sky and Spears had a good rhythm to this, which is a way of saying it didn’t look like s—t. You get plenty of cracking action, Gromit, and you should be grateful for it…GRATEFUL! You could be getting nothing! I enjoyed yelling at you without cause and this match was a fine clash of two very different, yet equally talented fighters. Spears winning with the loaded glove was lame, but this is a part of his character right now, so what did I expect?

Match #4: Tay Conti (with “Queen Slayer” Anna Jay of the Dark Order) def. Red Velvet (with Brandi Rhodes of the Nightmare Family)

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Red Velvet tried to put a quick end to the match, but Tay wouldn’t allow it. Red Velvet hit a leg lariat and then a standing moonsault but Tay kicked out! They slugged it out but Tay Conti took down Red Velvet with repeated Judo throws! Red Velvet used two consecutive clotheslines, an elbow and then a bulldog. She hit double knees on Conti! Red Velvet followed up with a stunner for a near fall! “Conti’s in big time trouble,” said Schiavone. They hit double roundhouse kicks on one another, and both were knocked to the mat! Anna Jay slid a chair into the ring for Tay to use, but Tay didn’t want the chair. Tay used a knee instead and pinned Red Velvet!

My Opinion: 2.6 out of 5 – Tay whooped Red’s ass and it was solid stuff. There’s nothing to rock the boat with here, but we did have a cool fight that teased what these two are gonna be capable of in a few years, so suck it people!

Match #5: (Main Event) Penta El Zero Miedo def. Rey Fenix

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Rey Fenix dodged a clothesline from Penta El Zero Miedo but then his brother blasted him with a thrust kick! They traded kicks until Rey Fenix rolled up Penta El Zero Miedo for a near fall. Rey Fenix was backdropped over the top to the arena floor by Penta El Zero Miedo! Rey Fenix jumped back into the ring to give some back to his brother, but he was quickly stopped. Penta El Zero Miedo ripped at his brother’s mask, nearly tearing it off! Rey Fenix and Penta El Zero Miedo chopped at one another’s chests. Penta El Zero Miedo was looking for the package piledriver but Rey Fenix fought out and rolled up his brother for a near fall. Rey Fenix hit a springboard for another near fall! Rey Fenix did a handstand flip into the ropes into a cutter on Penta El Zero Miedo for a two-count! Now Rey Fenix tried to rip the mask off Penta El Zero Miedo’s head! Rey Fenix rolled through but Penta El Zero Miedo spiked him on the head for a two-count! Rey Fenix used a tornillo to the floor on his older brother! Rey Fenix followed up with a senton atomico for a near fall on Penta El Zero Miedo! They traded strikes on the ring apron until Penta El Zero Miedo smashed Rey Fenix with a package piledriver on the apron, and then a second package piledriver to the outside! After a third package piledriver in the ring, Penta El Zero Miedo pinned Rey Fenix!

My Opinion: 4.6 out of 5 – Penta and Fenix went nuts on each other. Holy knockers! They ripped each other’s masks and smacked the Latino out of each other…OLE! If you like lucha as an MMA match, then this match will get you your fix. These guys blasted through some bitchin’ moves, but it was never just a stunt show. Penta was just mean man…just mean! I’d hate to be related to these two guys, because they just beat the s— out of each other the whole time. There was some scary s—t that happens in this match, make no mistake of that. I would never recommend that any wrestler work like this, but these two have a level of trust that most are never gonna have with each other, so suck it people! I…they need Band-Aids. That what this match taught me. Get these guys bandages! I liked this match… a lot.

News Of The Night:

  1. PAC is back and he is going to war with Eddie Kingston over Kingston stealing and corrupting The Lucha Brothers.
  2. Eddie Kingston tried to get Penta El Zero Miedo to ditch his brother, Rey Fenix, on account of being “dead weight”.
  3. Jade Cargill cut a lame promo to imply that Shaquille O’Neal wants to fight Cody Rhodes, which was interrupted by Brandi Rhodes, who cut the best promo of her life as if she just shanked a skank on the street….the street!
  4. Cody Rhodes wants to fight MJF again.
  5. MJF and Wardlow are in The Inner Circle and they are going to Las Vegas…pussies.
  6. Team Taz wants to fight Darby Allin until his baby-balls pop off.

Final Verdict: 4/5

There was some good action most of the way through, but the main event was something else. The main event was the thing here and it will leave a mark on you, unless you’re made of cast-iron. I like Walton Goggins and this was a pretty damn good show, over-a…what the…? McSkippy: Shoo! Nathan: You son of b… McSkippy: Shoo! Nathan: You shoo! You shoo! McSkippy: Shoo! Nathan and McSkippy: Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!

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