22nd Sep2020

WWE Raw – Sept 21st 2020: Results & Review

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Monday Night Raw review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and this is The Charlie Rose Show, complete with a complimentary shower (don’t bend over). We’ve got more from the RETRIBUTION faction, who just hate those hideous curtains you picked out to go over the landing. We’ve also got the big build toward the Clash Of Champions card, so let’s get to it…

Match #1: Andrade & Angel Garza def. Humberto Carrillo & Dominik Mysterio and Seth Rollins & Murphy – Raw Tag Team Championship Match at Clash of Champions

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

In a fast and furious Triple Threat Tag Team Match to determine Raw Tag Team Champions The Street Profits’ challengers this Sunday at WWE Clash of Champions, Dominik Mysterio & Humberto Carrillo looked to be flying high as Dominik sought to chase after his first WWE title. But the tides turned when Andrade & Angel Garza, who were out to prove they do not need Zelina Vega in their corner to succeed, began to take control. Seth Rollins abandoned his disciple Murphy in the middle of the bout, saying he had more important matters to tend to. That left Murphy at the mercy of Andrade & Garza, who put him away quickly to earn the title opportunity.

My Opinion: 3 out of 5 – There’s so good action in here, but the whole match felt like a Pitch Perfect movie…successful but useless. The right team won, but this whole match being randomly booked was a mistake…like Paul Mazursky casting Kris Kristofferson in “Blume In Love”. Kris Kristofferson sucks! He tried to kill Mel Gibson in “Payback”! They wouldn’t give him his $70,000! That’s just mean man! That’s just mean! You know what else is mean? This match…for me to poop on! I wanted this to go farther than just the normal WWE tag match format, but at least that format yielded some excellent little action sequences. All in all, Dabba-Kato/Dubba-Kano/Dibba-Kabo/Dobba-Kado/Steve is fighting Braun Strowman/Jerry McAsshole later on and this match was a decent opener.

Match #2: Drew McIntyre vs. Keith Lee – WWE World Title Shot At Clash Of Champions (No Contest)

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Keith Lee set out to earn himself a potential WWE Championship Match with Drew McIntyre at Clash of Champions. The Limitless One’s night did not end in glory, though, as Randy Orton, whose status for this Sunday was previously in question, returned just after McIntyre dropped Lee with a Claymore. The Viper battered McIntyre with a chair and smashed it into the previously fractured jaw of the WWE Champion before kicking Lee in the skull.

My Opinion: 3.1 out of 5 – Thee guys tried to knock each other around for a while, but Orton coming in and doing his attack ruined what was slowly turning into a good match. Why does Home Depot-Face Magee get to ruin perfectly good matches all the time? Are you paying for Orton screwing with other people’s matches? Dybba-Kybo/Dooba-Kooba/Debba-Kebo/Bill Ding fights Braun Strowman/Petey Peeknuckle later on and this match was like a naked man to Ellen Page…awkward.

Match #3: Zelina Vega def. Mickie James – Raw Women’s Title Match At WWE Clash of Champions

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

Though she came up short against Raw Women’s Champion Asuka last week, Mickie James found herself with the opportunity to earn another title opportunity. But standing in her way was Zelina Vega, who was looking to prove herself after slapping the champion last week. James put up a valiant effort once again, but Vega was determined to show that she has what it takes and put the veteran down with a devastating backstabber to set up her title showdown with The Empress of Tomorrow.

My Opinion: 3 out of 5 – This was okay. It needed more time. Hey Vince…give matches more time…bitch. Vega winning worked, but James winning wouldn’t have hurt my feelings either. Dobbo-Kobo/Dabbbabbajasaababajsaaha-Kanaajadadiudhaihaihaidhaihaiha/Dick-Face fights Braun Strowman/Stan Pitshants later on and this match was a decent effort.

Match #4: Apollo Crews def. Cedric Alexander

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

After Cedric Alexander turned his back on Apollo Crews and Ricochet last week, Crews was out for payback on his former friend. Alexander may have been a little preoccupied at ringside with Ricochet, got distracted and allowed Crews to roll him up for the three-count. After the bell, The Hurt Business attacked Crews and Ricochet, with Lashley putting Crews in the Hurt Lock, perhaps sending him a message ahead of their United States Championship Match this Sunday at Clash of Champions.

My Opinion: 3.2 out of 5 – This was a good, solid fight that had an actual ending, which made me feel like I was on acid. If a penguin eats a turkey, is it cannibalism or just (American) Thanksgiving? Gobble-Gobble, Morgan Freeman… It’s a shame that this didn’t go longer, but I’ve said that too many times in this review already. So, I’ll say this…wubba-dubba-yubba-bubba-lubba-fubba-nubba-gubba! There’s some excellent meshing of power and aerial wrestling here that made some small measure of redemption for this show possible, but not enough to bring back M.A.N.T.I.S. Bring back M.A.N.T.I.S. damn it! Dybunagsasjasjasjajah-Kauaaihsasajisbasi/Ditchuwanna-Kitchumanna/Dave fights Braun Strowman/Gus McSlut later on and this match deserved more from the bookers, because it was good.

Match #5: Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler def. Natalya & Lana

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler made quick work of Natalya & Lana, with The Queen of Spades forcing Lana to tap out to the Kirifuda Clutch. The champions then turned their attention toward their challengers this Sunday, The Riott Squad, who were at commentary. Nia Jax attempted to drive Liv Morgan through the announcers’ table, but she was thwarted by Ruby Riott. Jax then grabbed The Ravishing Russian, and for the second week in a row, drove her through a table.

My Opinion: 1.3 out of 5 – This could be said to have hardly occurred at all. This went by too quickly and too faintly to really deliver some-thing worth watching. Diddo-Kiddo/Dallo-Fallo/Dyko-Kyko/Nicky The Dick fights Braun Strowman/Big Pussy later on and this match blew ass.

Match #6: Asuka def. Peyton Royce (Disqualification)

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

After a confrontation with Peyton Royce earlier in the night, Asuka taught the Australian a lesson in respect, defeating her with the Asuka Lock. The Raw Women’s Champion came face to face with her challenger this Sunday, Zelina Vega, and sent her scrambling.

My Opinion: 1.3 out of 5 – This was lame when Royce was in control, which was often. Don’t let Royce be in charge of the match ever again. Dogga-Kogga/Denno-Kenno/Dacca-Kacca/Five Desperate Chicks fight Braun Strowman/Piggy McSkank later on and this match was a waste of Asuka.

Match #7: (Main Event) The Hurt Business vs. RETRIBUTION

The following is courtesy of wwe.com:

The main event of Monday Night Raw saw the in-ring debut of T-BAR, Mace & Slapjack of RETRIBUTION, as they took on The Hurt Business’ Bobby Lashley, Shelton Benjamin & Cedric Alexander. The vigilantes dominated the Six-Man Tag Team battle until the United States Champion came into the fray and unleashed his fury. Lashley had Slapjack in the Hurt Lock, but T-BAR attacked him from the ring apron, causing the match to be thrown out. That set off an absolute melee, as RETRIBUTION’s minions swarmed the ring. WWE Champion Drew McIntyre led the Raw roster to the ring to fight off the invaders, setting off a chaotic brawl. But in the midst of the fracas, Randy Orton slithered into the ring and dropped McIntyre with an RKO. Will it be the same scene when they clash for the WWE Title in an Ambulance Match this Sunday at WWE Clash of Champions?

My Opinion: 3.1 out of 5 – The action itself was very good, but the match was mostly just moves upon other moves. That friggin’ Yodel was so good. I wish I was eating it right now. UHUHUHUHUHUHUHUH. The RETRIBUTION guys wore stupid masks and got trounced by the normal guys, which ought to keep the gimmick alive. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH…screw this shit. It was good, but so was Dubbya-Dubbya 2, stick that up your ass. I’m not doing that stupid Dabba-Kato joke again, so shove that up your ass and watch this match with one eye open and the other poked out by Seth Rollins.

News Of The Night:

  1. Braun Strowman beat Dabba-Kato in Raw Underground, as well as Dolph ZIggler beating Arturo Ruas and Riddick Moss beating Erik.
  2. RETRIBUTION is (most likely) Dominik Dijakovik, Mia Yim, Dio Maddin, Mercedes Martinez and Shane Thorne and they’ve got some stupid names (T-BAR, MACE and SLAPJACK).
  3. Drew McIntyre fights Randy Orton for the WWE World Title in an Ambulance match at Clash Of Champions.
  4. Asuka defends her Raw Women’s Title against Zelina Vega at Clash Of Champions.
  5. The Street Profits defend the Raw Tag Team Titles against Andrade & Angel Garza at Clash Of Champions.
  6. Apollo Crews fights for the United States Title against Bobby Lashley at Clash Of Champions.
  7. Aleister Black attacked Kevin Owens to keep that feud alive.

Final Verdict: 1.9/5

There’s some decent wrestling here and there, but the booking and the RETRIBUTION faction just brought the show down to a screeching halt.


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