03rd Jun2020

‘Impact Wrestling’ Review (June 2nd 2020)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s Impact Wrestling review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and you’re just a broom wearing boots?! Holy shit! Well, as I imagine more weird things for you to say…I’m so lonely…here comes Impact.

Match #1: Kiera Hogan & Tasha Steelz def. Kylie Rae & Susie

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Last week, Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz sent a message to Kylie Rae when they attacked her in the backstage area – they are a force to be reckoned with in the Knockouts division. It was the dark and mysterious Susie who came to the aid of Kylie, but she too fell victim to the numbers game. Kylie Rae and Susie had a chance at revenge when they met Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz in tag team action. In the early going, Tasha’s bad attitude was rubbing Susie the wrong way, prompting her to slap the Boricua Badass across the face. Kylie almost scored the victory when she hit Kiera with a devastating Kylie Special. As the match broke down, it was a double team flurry culminating with a swinging suplex from Kiera that put Susie down for three.

My Opinion: 2.3 out of 5 – This never really went anywhere, like my career as a ballet dancer. No one did a bad job, but the match just couldn’t get going. It was a lot of movement, but not a lot of action.

Match #2: Joseph P. Ryan (Joey Ryan) w/ Dave & Jake Crist def. Crazzy Steve

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Joseph. P Ryan looked to cancel Crazzy Steve and transform him into Unwell Steven when they met in singles action. Accompanying Joseph to ringside was Dave and Jake Crist. Joseph invited them to observe how Cancel Culture takes care of their problems after the recent departures of Sami Callihan and Madman Fulton from oVe. Joseph spent more time praising his own in-ring ability instead of continuing his attack and this allowed Crazzy Steve to gain control of the match. However, it was Dave and Jake Crist who ended up paying dividends in the end. As Jake preoccupied the referee, Dave distracted Crazzy Steve on the top rope. Joseph took advantage of the distraction, connecting with a devastating superkick to win the match.

My Opinion: 2.9 out of 5 – These guys got a lot done in just a few minutes. The match needed a bit more oomph to it, but this was always easy to watch. The dork gimmick Ryan has right now still sucks, but he can still drop-kick like a mother-f—–. Both of these guys had a good showing and got the ball rolling for the rest of the show.

Match #3: Rohit Raju def. Chase Stevens

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Chase Stevens is a TNA original and former multi-time Tag Team Champion but now, he competes on his own. Rohit Raju is also focusing on his singles career as he moves away from the Desi Hit Squad, transforming himself into the Desi Hitman. Last week, Stevens goaded Rohit into challenging him to a match – and what a match it was. During the match, Rohit claimed that he would not let Chase Stevens come into IMPACT Wrestling and steal his spotlight. However, it was too much trash-talking from Rohit that allowed Stevens to connect with a big scissors kick for two. As Stevens was building momentum, Rohit used the referee as a human-shield, halting Stevens in his place. Rohit capitalized with a top rope double foot stomp to steal the victory.

My Opinion: 3 out of 5 – Raju was a house of fire from bell to bell, but Chase never got burned by the flames. Both fighters kept the pace fast and brisk, which is the way I like it. Chase is looking really good these days, which is very heartening. While this may not be the match of the year, it was pure fun.

Match #4: Rascalz (Dez & Wentz) def. TJP & Fallah Bahh – Tag Team #1 Contenders Match

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Recently, The North have defended their Tag Team Championships in some of the most unique match-ups we’ve ever seen. What they haven’t been doing is defending against the most deserving of challengers – enter TJP, Fallah Bahh and the Rascalz. These teams are two of the hottest in IMPACT Wrestling today, both deserving of a title opportunity. However, only one team can challenge The North and they battled it out on IMPACT! to determine who that would be. The pace of the match picked up in a hurry as both teams displayed their own creative forms of offense. The win almost came for the Rascalz when Wentz delivered a strong double foot stomp to TJP. Luckily for him, Fallah had his back and broke the referee’s count before three. TJP attempted his signature Mamba Splash, only to have Dez cut him off with knees to the gut. TJP had Dez in the ankle lock but in a fascinating finish, Wentz pushed Dez on top of TJP, leading to the pin and the win. After the match, both teams displayed outstanding sportsmanship as they shook hands in the middle of the ring.

My Opinion: 3.6 out of 5 – Talk about excellent wrestling. There were lots of wild risks taken here, but it never got in the way of the wrestling. I liked this whole thing. Roger Ebert talked just like me. I am a f—— genius! I’m not bad at this job at all! One thing I can say is that this was equal parts power moves and X-Division action. I’m not an ass-for-brains and this was good stuff.

Match #5: (Main Event) Ace Austin def. Wentz – #1 Contenders Tournament Final

The following is courtesy of impactwrestling.com:

Trey earned his spot in the finals of the #1 Contenders Tournament but when it was time for him to make his entrance, he was nowhere to be seen. Josh Mathews revealed a commotion in the back where Trey had been laid out by an unknown attacker. Confident that it was Ace Austin, Wentz ran to the ring for a confrontation. While Ace was denying his involvement in the attack, Scott D’amore came out and announced that Wentz would be replacing Trey in the match – ring the bell! This was a side of Wentz we had never seen before as he put in a unrelenting attack on Ace. But his emotions quickly got the best of him which allowed Ace to capitalize and take control. Meanwhile, Wentz had just competed in a grueling tag team match earlier in the night. The fight spilled to the outside as Ace sent Wentz crashing into the steel guardrails. The beat-down continued for several minutes until Wentz fired himself up for one final attack. In the end, it wasn’t enough as Ace got his knees up on a Swanton attempt, then connected with The Fold to win. The winner of the #1 Contenders Tournament and next in line for a World Title opportunity – Ace Austin.

My Opinion: 3.7 out of 5 – This was a real meaty sort of sauce. It may have been two ‘cruiserweights’ but these guys got rough and mean (this was a grudge match as well) and smacked each other around = these guys hit hard and never let up, which gave the whole match a “my husband’s fighting the gorillas at the zoo” vibe to it. When it’s good, it’s golden and this sucker shined like gold.

News Of The Night:

  1. Trey was attacked, so he couldn’t compete in the World Title tournament.
  2. A person in a hood watched a news report on all of the wrestlers released from World Wrestling Entertainment, as if to imply that many of them could be returning to the league in time for Slammiversary, which is scheduled for July.
  3. Havoc and Nevaeh are a team now.
  4. Jordynne Grace defends her Knockout’s Title against Taya Valkyrie, next week.
  5. Rosemary still wants to own John E. Bravo.
  6. Jake Crist betrayed his brother Dave to join Joey Ryan in Cancel Culture.
  7. Michael Elgin was attacked by Ken Shamrock in retaliation for being attacked by Elgin a few weeks ago.

Final Verdict: 3.4/5

This show started off tepid, but the last few matches really brought this thing home, even though a lot of the good angles felt a bit lame.

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