13th Feb2020

‘All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite’ Review (Feb 12th 2020)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have PAC screaming at Kenny Omega and his stupid hair cut. It’s time to kick some ass with Allstate…Jack Bauer.

aew-dynamite-poster-2

Match #1: Kenny Omega & Hangman Page defeated SCU – AEW Tag Team Championship Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Before the bell rang, the Dark Order appeared on the screen atop the entrance ramp and said the Exalted One was coming soon! Chris Daniels told SCU he’d go to the back, leaving ringside to investigate whatever Dark Order may be planning. Omega isolated Frankie’s shoulder with Steamboat-esque arm drag takeovers. Scorpio Sky kicked Omega in the back with a cheap shot. Omega was rolled up by Frankie for a two count! SCU were vicious tonight, showing a bit of a mean streak. Scorpio Sky hit a beautiful flat liner on Omega. They went for SCU Later but Page ran in to prevent it. Omega took down Sky with a hurracanrana, then a shotgun drop kick to Frankie, knocking him to the outside. Sky interfered again, but Omega took out both members of SCU as he hurled himself over the top rope to the outside! Omega hit a fishermen’s buster on Sky for a near fall, and then tagged in Page. Sky was tossed back with a fall away slam from Page. Kazarian knocked “Hangman” off the top rope, and then muscled Omega into the corner turnbuckles. “It’s almost a back-to-basics approach from SCU,” said Excalibur. SCU racked up a number of timely, quick tags, and worked over Omega’s lower back. Frankie hit a low cross body on Omega, and then applied body scissors. Omega found the fighting spirit deep down inside and powered up to his feet, trying to make the tag. Page wasn’t available, tending to his own injury. Finally Omega found “Hangman” for the tag, who worked as a one-man wrecking crew on SCU! Page was connecting with consecutive running clotheslines in opposite sides of the ring to SCU! Page went for the Buckshot Lariat, but Kazarian got out of the way. SCU used a swinging assisted DDT for a very near fall on Page! Kazarian hit a cutter on Omega, and SCU had the champs in stereo submission holds, but Omega was able to knock him and his partner free. Omega used the V-trigger, and then a snapdragon suplex on Kazarian. Page powerbombed Kazarian, and then they finished things off with the Buckshot Lariat-V-Trigger combo on Kazarian for the pin!

My Opinion: 3.9 out of 5 – This was a very strong, fierce match that was low of wrestling acumen, but high on adrenaline-laced thrills cut with high-octane mayhem. These two teams went back forth on move-after-move of frenetic slams that will knock your teeth loose like an Alabama dentist with a DeWalt molar drill. If you want to kick Facebook’s ass, then just send Zuckerberg some anthr…I’ll stop short of saying the wrong thing. I must have been watching those lousy “Facebook Group” commercials. Any-way, this match kicked ass, so send Zuckerberg some anthr…sorry.

Match #2: Dustin Rhodes defeated Sammy Guevara

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Rhodes got a great ovation from his hometown crowd. Sammy immediately darted to the outside as Dustin charged for him. Hager tried to distract Dustin as Sammy came back in from the opposite side, but it didn’t work—Dustin clobbered Sammy with a thrust to the throat! Sammy tried to run, but Dustin was more than willing to take the fistfight to the outside of the ring. Sammy tried for a springboard but Dustin caught him and dropped him face first. “A really good veteran counter,” said Jim Ross. Dustin hit two lariats on the 26-year old Guevara, and then a power slam. The crowd chanted “You still got it!” Dustin climbed to the top rope and was distracted by Hager. Sammy took advantage of the opportunity and hit a GTS on Dustin for a two count! They went back to the top, and Dustin rocked Sammy with the Canadian Destroyer! Dustin got the three count after the Final Reckoning!

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was a really good match that made both of these guys look like top-dollar athletes. Who woulda thought that Goldust would be more over then half of the people in wrestling into his fifties? Sammy is just too damn good to be losing right now, though. The whole deal with Dustin beating Sammy is cool for a fan like me, but if you want that Darby Allin match to look like a big deal for Sammy, then he needs to come into that a winner. Dustin didn’t need this victory to make his match with Hager sound good. Anyway, the finish aside, this was a damn good match.

Match #3: Nyla Rose defeated RIHO – AEW Women’s Championship Match

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

“She believes tonight is her night,” Excalibur said of Nyla Rose. RIHO ran into Nyla’s corner, and Nyla swatted her to the mat. RIHO tried for a dropkick, and again, Nyla batted her away. RIHO sprung off the top to the outside, but Nyla caught her with a massive backbreaker. Nyla pulled a table out from beneath the ring. As Nyla was setting it up, RIHO ran right across the table’s surface and stomped on the “Native Beast!” RIHO’s offensive attack was short lived; Nyla gave RIHO a double-axe handle for her troubles, then began to stomp on her. Nyla tried for a choke slam but RIHO escaped with a crucifix bomb! RIHO hit a low dropkick on Nyla, but Nyla kicked out at two! Nyla used a Samoan drop on RIHO for her own two count! Nyla propped RIHO across the middle of the top rope, and then took flight and dropped her knee across RIHO’s back! Somehow RIHO found the intestinal fortitude to lift her shoulder at two! Nyla bit the face of RIHO and then blasted RIHO with an avalanche death valley driver. Again RIHO found the will to kick out! The crowd was chanting RIHO’s name! Nyla tried to get the One-Winged Angel on RIHO, but RIHO fought out of it and nailed two snapdragon suplexes. RIHO used a Northern Lights suplex, but it wasn’t enough to finish Nyla. RIHO hit the foot stomps from the top rope three consecutive times, but Nyla kept kicking out! Nyla ran into RIHO with a spear and then powerbombed her for the victory!

My Opinion: 4 out of 5 – This was a fantastic match that may have used a few too many kick-outs, but they were really effective in selling the bout as a major prize fight, so f— it. I loved this sucker like Olivia Newton-John bare-ass naked in the shower. “I Honestly Love You”…this match. Hey! I can talk to the matches! Y’all talked to rocks and plants in the 70s! What the hell was up with that s—?! You know what’s up with this match? It kicks ass! Plus, Nyla is (to my knowledge), the first transgender champion amongst a women’s division. This was the best thing so far.

Match #4: MJF defeated Jungle Boy

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

Brandi Rhodes joined the commentary team to watch the next match, which was Jungle Boy (with Luchasaurus and Marko Stunt) vs. Maxwell Jacob Friedman (accompanied by Wardlow)! MJF and Jungle Boy grappled in the center of the ring, exchanging holds and counters. Jungle Boy knocked MJF right off his feet with a swift push. Jungle Boy was lighting up MJF with chops and then an arm drag from off the top! MJF was infuriated, pulling Jungle Boy by the hair to the outside. MJF whipped Jungle Boy into the steel barricade, and then body slammed him to the arena floor! Jungle Boy turned the tide with a back body drop and elbows to MJF! Jungle Boy fired up even more with a lariat, two tope suicidas and then a tope con hilo! Jungle Boy planted MJF for a two count! Jungle Boy tried to deadlift MJF but his injured back gave out on him. In the center of the ring, MJF applied a deep submission on Jungle Boy, but somehow Jungle Boy escaped it! Jungle Boy used a running Liger bomb on MJF for a two count! As the referee was distracted, Wardlow gave MJF his Dynamite Diamond Ring, and MJF caught Jungle Boy with the loaded fist! MJF pinned Jungle Boy after connecting with the Double Cross!

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was a hell of a match to only go about ten minutes. Jungle Boy has the goods, there’s no doubt about that. MJF is on another level at this point and could easily be the champion for AEW. The announcer’s made note of how this could be a PPV main event soon enough, so that ought to give us some indication of where things are going. These guys were smooth in the ring, like butter on a baby’s ass. Next time, this should go longer, much longer.

Match #5: (Main Event) Jon Moxley defeated Santana

The following is courtesy of allelitewrestling.com:

“It’s Biblical, J.R. It’s literally an eye for an eye!” said Excalibur. The two men were brawling in the crowd before the bell rang. They slugged it out to the ring, but the action spilled back to the outside as Mox jumped off the top rope to the floor onto Santana! Momentum shifted with Santana landing a running kick to Mox. Ortiz laughed and taunted Mox on the outside, yelling, “We’re the best! We’re the best!” Back in the ring, Santana continued to work over Mox’s blind side. Moxley applied a Fujiwara arm bar onto Santana, and then a release German suplex! Santana rolled through with a cutter and an arrogant pin attempt. Santana then hit a stalling pile driver, but Mox mustered out! “It’s a slobber knocker without a doubt,” said Jim Ross. Santana went for the frog splash but Mox got his knees up! Santana blocked a lariat and returned the favor with a thrust kick to his opponent. Mox connected with a brutal lariat of his own! Moxley headed to the top, but Ortiz, standing on the outside, spit alcohol from his flask into Mox’s good eye. Santana went back up for the frog splash and this time he found it! Mox escaped the pin at two! Moxley dug his thumb into Santana’s bad eye, and then defeated Santana with the Paradigm Shift!

My Opinion: 3.5 out of 5 – This was a good brawl with a break-through performance for Santana, who profited from Jon doing his maniac routine. I don’t think most will call this match of the year or anything like that, but this was satisfying up to a certain point and pretty damn good overall.

News Of The Night:

  1. Darby Allin had a great vignette where he did Sammy Guevara’s “Love Actually” signs to wage war with Sammy at Revolution.
  2. Jake Hager fights Dustin Rhodes at Revolution.
  3. There’s a battle royal next week to decide the contender’s to the Tag Team Titles at Revolution.
  4. The Lucha Bros. fight The Elite for the Tag Team Titles, next week.
  5. The Dark Order says that the Exhalted One is coming.
  6. Santana cut a great promo with Jim Ross on why Jon Moxley’s stab to the eye was more than just physically damaging.
  7. PAC cut another great promo on Kenny Omega being his enemy.
  8. Britt Baker cut another terrible promo in her lame heel turn that is actually working well for her, even though it’s mostly due to the AEW crowds just not liking her (not as talented as others in her division) and cheap heat.
  9. Jeff Cobb debuted to attack Jon Moxley on Chris Jericho’s behalf, as well as to push the match he has with Moxley, next week.

Final Verdict: 3.6/5

This turned out quite well, with shorter matches and too many promos keeping this from really picking up steam.

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