12th Dec2019

‘All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite’ Review (Dec 11th 2019)

by Nathan Favel

Welcome to this week’s All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite review, right here on Nerdly. I’m Nathan Favel and we have…who f—— knows. This show has nose-dived a lot in the past few weeks, so it needs to really knock it out of the park to win the game. Okay, let’s find out if my lame baseball reference goes anywhere.

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Match #1: Jon Moxley defeated Alex Reynolds

My Opinion: 1.2 out of 5 – This was a five second squash. F— this s—.

Match #2: The Butcher & The Blade (with The Bunny) defeated Cody Rhodes & QT Marshall

My Opinion: 3.2 out of 5 – This went long enough to get the winners over like their debut should do for them. The weirdo team was very impressive, like a gopher cutting hair. QT looked good here and Cody still looks like Jared Leto after a bee sting. Overall, this match was not too shabby and offered some hard-hitting action that won’t let you doze off.

Match #3: Big Swole defeated Emi Sakura

My Opinion: 3.4 out of 5 – This was a fine fight with two consistent performances from two fabulous athletes. Swole stood out as a tough-as-nails fighting machine in a match where she fought some-one just like her in Emi. This was as intense a match in recent memory, with some pacing issues every now and then, but it was always worth watching. I thought this was pretty good and you might feel the same way.

Match #4: Kenny Omega & Adam Page defeated Kip Sabian & Shawn Spears

My Opinion: 3.3 out of 5 – This was by-the-numbers tag team wrestling that did its job and nothing more. Every-one moved well here and kept the rhythm of the match steady from bell to bell, but there’s no reason to look at this as a classic. This is the kind of match that is fine, but not vital viewing. Under different circumstances, this could have been a classic, but in this case, we got a commercial for matches in the near future instead. If Kevin Feige ran this league, he would have made this a half an hour slug-fest with enough action to make you cream your corn. I’m not always a Kevin Feige fan, but his policy of “do it while you can” is a virtue that AEW (and wrestling in general) should adopt. Overall, this wasn’t bad at all, but it wasn’t great either.

Match #5: Luchasaurus defeated Sammy Guevara

My Opinion: 3.2 out of 5 – This was fun, but Sammy losing felt a bit off. I’m happy that LS has gotten over, but Sammy is just as over and is in greater need of a solidifying victory right now. Also, this was around the six minute mark, which is a woeful waste of two fantastic talents. I thought AEW was supposed to have longer matches? This is like watching Monday Night Raw be stalked by Incrediboy…who’s not affiliated with him! The match tried to achieve some-thing worth talking about, but the brief time allotted to the bout kept it from doing more than just coming to an end abruptly.

Match #6: (Main Event) The Young Bucks defeated Proud And Powerful (Santana & Ortiz) – Texas Street Fight Match

My Opinion: 3.6 out of 5 – This was a big, mean match that went all over the place and made my kidneys bleed. P&P said they went to AEW to make history (and not fade into obscurity) and I think they’re doing that in AEW. The tag teams in this league feel like an off-shoot of all of the great team bouts of Jim Crockett’s past and this match is in line with that statement. In any case, these guys tried to take a chunk of guy out of each other’s asses and they were just about successful. This is the kind of main event that won’t make you feel like noddin’ off, I tell you what. Give this tough sucker a bit of your time and it’ll give it back to you in spades as sharp as sun-roasted razor-wire.

News Of The Night:

  1. Brandi Rhodes, a black woman, has acquired several skin-head white people to help her do…what-ever. That sure as hell sounds like the Bizarro-World version of American History X.
  2. AEW is running a February Chicago PPV called “Revolution”.
  3. Chris Jericho fights Jungle Boy for ten minutes in a non-title match, next week.
  4. Britt Baker fights Kris Statlander for a Women’s Title shot, next week.

Final Verdict: 3.3/5

This was about as interesting as NXT, with its own set off deficiencies and weaknesses. There was some good wrestling here, but the show just felt tepid the whole way through.

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