22nd Mar2018

‘Dude Bro Party Massacre 3’ Review

by Nik Holman

Stars: Alec Owen, Ben Gigli, Olivia Taylor Dudley, Greg Sestero, Erik Sandoval, Chelsea St. John, Skyler Rousselet, Larry King, Logan Olson, Jon Worley, Matt Hargreaves, Ian Ahern, Lily Cade, Laura Lee Cebrick, Ela Darling | Written by 5-Second Films | Directed by Tomm Jacobsen, Michael Rousselet, Jon Salmon


Is Dude Bro Party Massacre III the first Oscar worthy film of the year? In short, yes.

Created as what seemed like a dare by the online comedy group, 5-Second Films, this retro 80’s slasher flick harkens back to a simpler, blood-splattered time, when sex and violence worked hand-in-hand and fraternity jocks in tight shorts would high-five each other and take showers together without a hint of erotic irony. The story is told as sort of a “lost film”. It goes like this; President Regan had the film banned and all copies destroyed. Only one public broadcast station played the movie late at night and one kid stayed up to record it. The film you are watching is a copy of that recording. That small, goofy premise immediately sounded fun to me.

Visually,  Dude Bro Party Massacre 3 has the grainy, slightly warped quality of a VHS tape pulled right off the shelf of your local Pick-A-Flick Video. Many films try to capture that “lost footage” vibe through degraded quality tape, but the effect still appears a little too clean, too polished. I don’t know if 5-Second Films just did a better job in the editing room, or if they simply have cheaper equipment, but the effect actually feels authentic.
Not to say that Dude Bro is all looks and no substance. This film has a lot of guts to call itself the third in a franchise that doesn’t exist. Yes, Dude Bro Party Massacre III is the one and only installment of this “trilogy”. The first scene of the film is devoted to catching us up on the horrifying events of the first two. Cutting two imagined horror movies down to only their nude scenes and kill scenes is as hilarious as it is genius. From murdered streakers to death by arcade games, it’s obvious that a lot of love and fun went into thinking up 20-plus characters and their deaths. I knew from the first scene that 5-Second Films loves the horror genre and loves me, too.

It’s almost impossible to summarize the story in a way that actually makes sense. Each member of the cast wrote a part of the film sequestered away from the influence of the others and somehow tied these random threads together to create a functioning, if completely absurd plot. Everyone has their own sub-plot like a horror version of Wet Hot American Summer. You’ll be treated to characters like the nice guy who hasn’t learned to swear, a pledge desperately trying to earn his way out of the “Beef Box”, a virgin sacrifice, magical bags of oranges, and Ronald Regan. Does any of that make sense? It doesn’t have to because, honestly, neither did any of the 80’s slasher flicks Dude Bro is successfully parodying.

If I had to find a fault, it would be that the movie sometimes feels a little too desperate at being funny. The jokes fly at a breakneck speed, while some land and some don’t. It’s almost as if the writers were playing with the law of averages. Some of the bits go on longer than they should. Yes, a police officer creating a Bang Bus for children (trust me, it’s funny in context) gets a laugh, but I got the joke in the first minute. It didn’t need to go on for five. It’s like when my 11 year old son says something funny and then keeps repeating it, expecting to the get the same laugh. At the beginning of the scene I was laughing, by the end I was kind of bored. That happens a couple of times. 5-Second Films reminds me of an unpolished Broken Lizard. Still great, but a little time and practice will really hone their comedic skills and teach just a bit of restraint.

From start to finish, I was hooked on this film. In these days when the entertainment industry feels the need to preach at everyone like a coked-up evangelist at a Friday night tent revival; it’s a nice change to watch a flick that absolutely does not take itself seriously. The jokes come fast. The gore is plentiful. I wholeheartedly recommend Dude Bro Party Massacre 3 to anyone who loves the horror genre, or more importantly, loves to the piss out of it.

Dude Bro Party Massacre III is available now via Amazon, JB HI-FI, Amazon Video, Google Play, Youtube Movies and Vimeo On Demand.


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