10th Apr2013

‘Grindhouse 7: Beach Babes From Beyond’ Review

by Phil Wheat

Stars: Joe Estevez, Don Swayze, Joey Travolta, Burt Ward, Jackie Stallone, Linnea Quigley, Sarah Bellomo, Tamara Landry, Nicole Posey, Michael Todd Davis, Ken Steadman, Michael Roddy, Albert Andrukaitis | Written by Alexander Sachs | Directed by Ellen Cabot

BBFB-dance

Directed by Ellen Cabot (aka David DeCoteau), Beach Babes From Beyond is technically not a Full Moon film, as it is in fact one of the earliest releases from Charles Band’s 1993 created Torchlight label which specialised in genre-tinged softcore porn comedies. The imprint only ever produced three films between 1993 and 1998, including this film, its direct sequel, and a softcore vampire flick entitled Blonde Heaven, all of which were directed by David DeCoteau under his “Ellen Cabot” pseudonym.

Ridiculous blend of 60s beach party flick and direct to video porn (which is more evident in the deleted scenes), Beach Babes From Beyond suffers from a complete lack of plot and inordinately long musical numbers features extras dancing, badly may I add, on the beach, all interspersed with numerous softcore porn scenes featuring various members of the cast swapping partners and getting their freak on with each other – in the deleted scenes, should you have the will to watch them after sitting through the film, these sequences drag on to the point of mundanity and ridicule…

One of a number of “bikini beach” movies made in the early 90s, Beach Babes From Beyond is probably best known for starring porn star Roxanne Blaze (under the name Sarah Bellomo) and for the amount of celebrity relatives in the cast: Sly Stallone’s mum, Martin Sheen’s brother, Patrick Swayze’s brother, John Travolta’s brother and bizarrely, former Robin to Adam West’s Batman, Burt Ward.

The picture quality of this DVD release jumps from soft-focus third-generation VHS to just plain VHS quality that looks like it has been overly DNR’d – although given Full Moon’s lack of effort in the companies latter releases this is no doubt down to the print available rather than any attempt at cleaning up the film.

Beach Babes From Beyond is out now from 88 Films.

* 1/5

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